有關英文句子的詢問

我唔建議你寫家庭.
講完你公司無啦啦用你18歲開始游水黎結尾有d怪.
如果你真係想寫游水, 我建議你家多幾句and改一改其他.

My name is Peter Cheung. I am twenty-five years old. I completed the *commerce course* (塡番個course名) in the Hong Kong Institute of Vocational Education and graduated in 2004. I now run an insurance company in *Hong Kong*.( /I am the owner of an insurance company in *Hong Kong*.) My business is a success. Eight branches(你係咪想講分行) have been opened until now. My favourite hobby is swimming. I started swimming seven years ago. I love how swimming relaxes both my body and mind, taking all the stress away. It also keeps me healthy.

**如果唔吻合你改番

It's not "year olds". It's "years old". Remember!

Can you stick to ONE account id?

2014-03-01 00:37:57 補充：
No matter what thread title you use, it seems to me you are only interested in tenses. It is this sole concern of yours that makes your sentences very weird and unnatural.

從文法而來修正:My name is Peter Cheung. I am twenty five year olds. I have a mother, a father and a sister. I graduated from the Hong Kong Institute of Vocational Education in 2004. I studied commercial subjects. I am working in[不太肯定你的職位角色-operating只會用於實體的東西：例如machine或電腦，這字不會用於business或公司或行業，working in只是指你在這行業工作，但下句你似說是你成立了八間保險公司，那你是大股東囉，你就不單是working而是兩句夾埋=I own eight insurance companies.] the insurance business now. Eight insurance companies have been established. [這句改用被動式只能估你意思是講你創立了八間保險公司] I have been swimming since I was eighteen year olds. 內容有爸有媽可以省去！