請問這篇英文作文是什麼意思?

請問這篇英文作文是什麼意思?
It was a piercingly cold wintry night. The clock on the wall had just stroked three. Suddenly, the telephone rang screechily. Frightened by this seemingly ominous ring, everyone in my uncle's awakened with hearts throbbing violently. From the other end of the telephone line, my brother sobbed to announce surprising news: my grandfather had hung himself. Empty in my brain and at a loss, I hurried back home with my uncle and my sister. Rushing into my house, I saw my grandfather's cotton quilt covering his whole body. Perhaps because of the way he died, his death made me ambivalent, thinking of him and yet dreading him more.

In the first year after he passed away, the feeling of losing something immediately hit me as soon as I went back home. The strong desire to see him again caught me tightly. I could not accept the truth of his death in feeling as well as in reason. Nevertheless, every time midnight drew near, dread always expanded in my heart because the legend about the return of a soul flashed into my brain. I was sorry to have that dread, but I could not restrain it at all.

His death also gave me many nightmares, in which he always appeared in dire forms. In a dream, I was frightened by his green and pale face twice its normal size showing outside of our window and presenting the desire to come in. In another dream, when I came out of the toilet, his poker face suddenly emerged from underground and surrounded my feet, which made cold perspiration seep out of my pores. Once I dreamed he was resurrected for a period of time, but he needed to report his arrival to the Lord of Hell at the end of the time. In addition, I dreamed I was curious to open a gunny sack, which did not belong to us, and found my grandfather's corpse inside.

my grandfather took care of us like a mother and cultivated us like a father. I can never stop missing him, but I was really frightened by the manner of his death.