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Gotta be honest here as a meatatarian myself and the anticipated conversation topics this event seems to have to offer.. if I was SIL I'd be busy that day. Your plans sound boring, I'd rather go to work.
I'm a meatataian and my husband is a pescatarian ... he will eat food with anyone regardless of their dietary choice and he isn't limited to certain topics that he will talk about. I'm not a big red meat eater, I mostly have chicken or turkey. He is a really good cook and he makes dinner every night. He will make a seafood version and a meat/poultry version of everything he makes.
I'm an animal lover and have many pets but it's not the only conversation topic I have to offer in life. I also as a host would accommodate all of my guests, not just ones who agree with me, who I like or who eat the same thing I do. Remember for your wedding reception menu, you're feeding a crowd not just yourself. If you pick food many don't like, they won't eat it and that will be a waste of money.
If you want someone to respect your life choices, you have to offer the same.
If you don't invite one sister-in-law, you shouldn't invite the other one, vegan or not.
I think you are shallow as sh*t.
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You and you "besties" sound like some real mental cases so she is best to stay away from you anyway
It’s your party. She will be fine eating whatever you offer. No one needs to eat meat every single meal, just like no one needs to eat lettuce every single meal.
That said, it seems a bit shallow that this is the reason you are considering not inviting your sister.
What a pitty that you are so incredibly self righteous that you'd alienate your husband's sisters over freaking food. REALLY?
Tofu burgers are disgusting to those who don't like them. Instead, why not prepare a nice salad or have a salad bar ? There are hundreds of hardy vegetable dishes you can prepare that your sister-in-law(s) will eat.
And, I would yawn myself asleep if I had to sit through hours of VEGAN and animal rights chit-chat. BORING for a party celebration. Yawn.
But, by reading between the lines, I can tell that you are just a trouble maker who has zero coping or problem solving skills.
Ask yourself: What is the real reason why I hate my husband's sister(s). Because food choices are a lame excuse to disinvite/exclude your future Family to a gathering that is meant to celebrate your UNION with THEIR brother.
I would HATE to have a sister-in-law as evil as you are. You are a pieceof work.
So, what now? You are going to avoid and exclude your sister-in-law(s) during future holidays and family celebrations until your husband divorces you? Laughable.
You sound like a real butt-hoIe...
Veganism is a mental disorder.
All humans were meant to eat MEAT. And of course anything else we can get.
We have 4 canine teeth, albeit quite small by comparison to carnivores.
Humans are born with a gall bladder. It is there to process fat (usually from meat).
There are ways around this that don't involve serving tofu burgers. And it's unfair of you to exclude your sister in law just because she eats meat.
If you want to include her but still don't want to serve any food containing meat, try looking into the plant based "burgers" that all the grocery stores sell nowadays. There are some good ones out there which taste just like regular ground beef when they are cooked, and look the same, too. They're not expensive, either.
As for your SIL's inability to participate in your conversations, she has a RIGHT to her own beliefs, just as YOU DO. I think you're just being petty and mean, not to mention SELFISH, by not including her. There's a big difference between "animal rights" and animal WELFARE, too. Do you KNOW what that is?
When you get together, all you do is talk about vegan issues?
Lordy, she won't miss that gathering hon, no matter how petty you are.
OK, so vegans can throw a tantrum about not being offered vegan meal or being excluded, but the opposite if fine.
Btw, probably you're doing her a favour if you don't invite her.
I can see you're getting some criticism here, perhaps because you came across as wanting to exclude a sil just because she isn't vegan. Sounds like you might not like her much anyway? Wedding events can be difficult, often involving having to interact with people you actually don't connect with however they are part of the picture that you're buying into.
Hopefully you will have some delicious vegan food on offer, not just tofu burgers. I'm not vegan however I've chef'd in a vegan kitchen and I know how wonderful the food can be, I loved using amazing fresh veg, herbs and spices, and wonderful cakes, pastries and desserts. May I suggest you put out some delicious salads, bread and vegan sweet dishes? I am sure all will enjoy.
Wouldn't you like to share the world of veganism by being generous and abundant, rather than excluding and small ?
You are a sad b i t c h who will end up with no friends in the end.
she wont want to come and eat the **** your going to cook or listen to the crap vagans talk about anyway. Vagans are weak as piss if were to get into a fight she will beat the crap out of all of you.
I don't understand why people judge others on their diet. I really don't. Who cares if your sister in law eats meat? Meat is part of the natural human diet, anyway. As far as i see it, it's ok to choose to be a vegan, or not.
If someone chooses not to eat things you're serving, that's their choice. I don't see why it's a big deal, either.
I think that being hateful and excluding people is pretty crappy though.
Surely she can find something to eat without it being meat.
Have you ever thought about just being honest and nice? Just call her or meet with her and explain that she might not feel comfortable at your party. She likely already knows about it and is hoping that you don't invite her. BTW, that is sisters in law.
I can spot a lie like a fart in a car
I used to live with a few people, one of them was a vegan who felt it was his right to tell others what to eat. I felt it was my right to tell him to STFU and mind his own business.
Why would having someone who is a non-vegan at your little party annoy you? Are you like the person who I lived with? I hope when you go to her house you don't make her make you a vegan meal, or else you would come across as a hypocrite. Oh wait, your a vegan so I imagine that goes hand in hand.
I think YOU are the problem, not your sister.
Obviously, you care more about animals than about human beings .. which means that your "caring" is fake. Such a hypocrite.
More than that, you choose your hypocrisy over family harmony. A good spouse encourages their spouse's relationship with their family.
And it is intolerant and dictatorial to insist that everyone else takes on YOUR food preferences. I have friends who are vegan, and when I invite them over, I always cater to their food choices, while also serving meat to those who choose meat.
You must be very insecure to be SO attached to your self-image as someone who doesn't eat meat. The fact that you are not as kind ot humans as you are to animals supports the fact that you do this not for the animals but because you lack self-esteem.
I really hate it when people like you use their insecurity to bully others.
Honestly you sound like a twit! So what if she is not a vegan. I know several vegans and I never have had problems choosing a place to eat. How would you believe if the reverse happened to you? How are you going to deal with people who have completely different interests then you?
Get off your high horse! Just because YOU don’t eat meat doesn’t mean everyone has to be vegan too. You can serve whatever you want, but you’re just one of those arrogant pricks who think you’re better than people who eat meat (which is our biological instinct as humans). How would you like it if your family left you out of an event because they disapprove of your diet? And if someone needs to be vegan to participate in conversation, you are a very boring crowd. It’s one thing to be vegan, but it’s ridiculous to discuss it all the time. I bet you like to lecture everyone you know about their diet.
"Also she adds nothing to the vegan conversation."
Oh, be quiet, troll. Go back to your creative writing class.
Its amazing that, with your immature and petty attitudes, you actually found someone who is willing to marry you. I guess this does prove there is someone for everyone.
So, it is really a club meeting of devoted practicing "vegans," not a luncheon.
Spare the woman your boring obsession. Keep it up and in 30 years you will all be old, wizened hags who have suffered many broken bones and severe nerve damage due to protein deprivation. Happened to someone I know.
Invite her, but make sure it will be an all veggie menu. Whether she comes will be up to her. If she comes, please don't ruin your own good time obsessing over her. If you do, you're not mature enough for marriage.
You say it's "her problem not yours". That is absolutely true. It's NOT your problem that she chooses not to eat everything you serve. Therefore, it's NOT a reason to leave her out.
It's everyone's own personal choice what they want to eat. Some people don't feel comfortable eating vegan food, and excluding a family member for such a silly reason is stupid, and if that's the case then you aren't mature enough for marrige.
Anyway, the whole thing sounds boring as S H I T , and I'd rather go to work than do any of that.
This is why people don't like vegans
You sound boring and more concerned about animals than people. Other than that, don't invite her. But YOU are having a pre-wedding party for yourself? My stepdaughter is vegan. She does more to HURT the cause than PROMOTE the cause. I am vegetarian, but I don't make other people uncomfortable.
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I agree - don't socialize with OR work with any meat eaters. That will teach them a lesson!
It would not kill you to have a real meat burger or two for her. Make her feel welcome and that you thought of her.
It would be unreasonable to invite everyone but her.
You don't however have to provide meat, just tell her it'll be a vegetarian meal.
If you would expect her to eat tofu burgers at your place would you be happy to eat meat at your brother's place? Or is it a matter that you are right and everyone else is wrong. If all you talk about is veganism then it sounds like an extremely radical religious group. Do you ever want to see your brother again? Somehow it seems not. Certainly I would never go anywhere that my wife wasn't absolutely made welcome. I provide beer for beer drinkers, plenty of vegetables and snacks for vegetarians but I grow meat and will eat it at home. Of course I will eat a vegetarian meal if I am invited elsewhere.
In other words I expect to bend over backwards to cater for someone here because I am well mannered. I also expect to eat and act as a good guest elsewhere because I am well mannered. However there are some that wouldn't know good manners if it slapped them in the face.
This would create a lifetime of resentment by excluding her. I am a meat eater, but I could eat vegan, if necessary. Talk to her and tell her to pack a lunch if she wants attend.
I would most definitely invite her. It would be quite rude to leave her out, especially since she is a relative now.
Most people can find something to eat , regardless of the menu. Meat eaters also enjoy salads, fruit, and such. She'll probably pass on the "tofu burger", as most meat eaters would.
I hope she will have the good grace to attend, even though your "party" sounds like a total bore to anyone who isn't on the same page as you are.
Be courteous, be pleasant, and it will pay off in the long run...for you.
Its simply rude to just leave her out. Invite her and tell her that its vegan. She can choose to come or not. Who cares what she will probably want. Its not all about the food, its about togetherness.
your petty as hell just invite her you don't need to serve meat she will eat what you give as long as your not an asshole to her
Yes, do her a huge favor & leave her out because you honestly sound like a such a bore. She’s not obligated to be a vegan just because you are & she’s not obligated to care about what you babble about, the entire universe does NOT revolve around you. Judging from everything you’ve said, it sounds like you’re the problem here, not her.
參考: Stupid a s s hippies.
You could invite her. She doesn’t have to eat anything
Your language shows your bias. Are you "convinced" you're a vegetarian, or you just are one?" A thoughtful host would have at least one menu item that everyone could eat--not necessarily a main dish. My daughter's vegetarian, and I do this all the time.
But you expect everyone to not only be vegetarian, but to judge all those who aren't. That's not your job.
fyi, from a scientific point of view, humans are, in fact, categorized as omnivores because they can live on both meat and vegetables. From a Christian point of view, God gave animals to Adam and Eve for food. Jesus ate fish and pascal lamb. Would you be lecturing him if he were there?
U SEEM TO THINK the food is more important than your friends ...I would rethink that situation so u dont lose them...why not have some of each? vegan is seen as boring by many people....turkey, beef, ham...nothing wrong with those so relax.
You sound pretty selfish. Maybe you should commit suicide by eating a Big Mac! 🍔 lol 😂
FYI, your sister-in-law is an omnivore if she eats both plant and animal based foods. It sounds as if she is a nice person to sit quietly and watch you eat and respectfully listens when you speak of alleged vegan issues. Maybe your conversation is teaching her something?
My answer is: When in doubt, be kind.
OMG you don't sound like a very nice person. The hostesses job is to make everyone feel comfortable and not talk nothing by vegan conversation knowing that one of your guests is being excluded (purposely). Your sil is family by the way and you're rude and a spoiled brat.
As Homer Simpson said: You don't win friends with salad.
Family is forever and you must have her since she is family.
Maybe she sits there in silence because she is bored AF during your "vegan conversation"
You are annoyed with this lady based on her NOT being vegan? It's not that she brings meat to your vegan gatherings or preaches at you about how mistaken your vegan ideas are, but that she may have eaten some roast beef yesterday when you weren't even around?
You take offense that guests don't eat everything you serve them? Not that they complain about what you serve. Simply that they don't eat the foods they don't care for. It's unreasonable for a host to get offended that a guest may not care for what is served.
If not "sit there in silence," what is it you expect her to do when the conversation turns to veganism? Isn't "say nothing" the polite course when one has nothing positive to say?
Here is the polite way to deal with this: Let her know it's going to be a vegan gathering, that there won't be any animal foods available. And that while you'd love for her to be part of the gathering, no one will take it amiss if she'd rather not participate in a vegan gathering.
But somehow I get the feeling this is about being snarky and snotty to your non-vegan sister-in-law.
Dont worry about it wouldn't say she wants to go it sounds ****, she can just stay at home and have a nice big steak
Like you say yourself, it's her problem not yours. So invite her. She knows what the menu will be like. But she can't accuse you of not inviting her.
just dont turn up to the summer thing or dont invite her , simple isnt it ..
That is a silly reason not to invite someone.
No, that's obnoxious. You can tell her there won't be meat at this event then leave it up to her as to whether or not she wants to attend. I too have to look away when I'm at a family event and meat's being served. But don't be that person who gives the rest of the vegan community a bad name by being so judgmental about other people.
See how your question doesn't make any sense?
Say I didn't like you because you didn't like eating farts and didn't want to be your friend or in your life because of that, and I wouldn't invite you to important events in my life simply because you didn't like to eat farts.
Sounds like you're being pretty ridiculous and over the top.
Invite her. She's part of your family and at the very least, it's disrespectful to your brother to not include his wife. You don't have to cater to her - she can or cannot eat what is offered. Being a meat eater, NOT eating meat isn't offensive, while the opposite seems to be true. I surely would think there are more to you and your "besties" than just being vegan. If all you discuss are vegan movements, maybe she'll decide not to come anyway. You could also try to include her and ask her opinion and have an actual discussion instead of chastising her for eating meat. It sounds like you have more than 1 issue with your SIL and her eating meat is an easy excuse.
As you say it's her problem not yours. I would invite her anyway so there wont be any hard feelings between you and your brother & his wife. Tell her she's welcome to come but there won't be any meat served which she's knows already, but it might make her not want to come.
Ok, so I think you have 2 issues here.
One is that you and your besties want to do the whole "veggie" / "veggie & vegan" bondfest? discussion? activism stuff? whatever veggie only, non-meat thing.
Two is that this a pre-wedding get together.
My suggestion is that maybe you separate those two concepts out. You want to have a meat free / animal product free get together and bond / activism / "*****" fest then awesome... Maybe do that as, bond with the earth day spa thing? And then do a pre-wedding meal at an outside venue (so you don't need to deal with it...) where there is plenty of vegetarian / vegan options but she has some options too (and if you can find something that does like organic, ethical treatment of animals stuff then better for you too).
it would be odd not to invite them.
what does it matter honestly
plan your menu, invite people and forget it.
if you seriously dont want to be around meat eaters then your wedding should just be a group of 5 besties....with no meat the cost should be low.
It's not that big of a deal. I was vegan almost forty years and everyone else ate meat maybe you can give her insight with so many of you can convince her how meat is death and disgusting. I know but I eat it a couple days a week anyway...wish my family had been vegan too.
I can't believe anyone fell for this troll's nonsense.
You are a typical spoiled american woman.
i would let her go and if she brings her own meats people there dont have to eat it
Unless you are in Australia or New Zealand, it is not safe to get together because there is a deadly pandemic going on, in case you missed the news.
Veganism is the least of your problems.
You’re a f*ckin freakshow nutcase. I hope she shows up to your snobby, warped idiot gathering and throws cows blood on you.
Petty just talk to her and lay out some ground rules
I have 4 vegans in my family. I was once a vegetarian for 7.5 years.. though I do eat meat now. Is it that you are unable to share table with meat eaters? Or you just hate this gal? Even though I do eat meat now, I often dine with family members who are vegans or vegetarians and have friends the same and I have never demanded meat on my plate. Tofu is a rather uninteresting food, for me, no matter how it's cooked and I've met many a vegan who felt the same. You intend for the conversation at dinner for your wedding party to be about vegan activism for the world and won't accept any input that you don't previously know you will agree with?
Seriously, it's tofu burgers or nothing? No..lets say... vegetables? Steaming delicious vegetables and rice or something with less gluten? I just can't imagine having a celebratory party with a crowd of mostly vegans and feeding them tofu burgers. Phony meat. I think you might expand your vegan menu and leave your superior attitude at the door. Seriously? It's tofu burgers or don't bother to come?
Gosh, there is a world out there with really delicious vegan food. That everyone can love to eat. Do you cook at all?
if she would respect your wedding tell her up front to her face. I mean its your wedding.
Tell her to treat it like it was lent day. Or just have the wedding on lent day.
That’s a ridiculous reason not to have her. There’s nothing wrong with her eating meat have her there.
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OMG. That is super gross. Bleh!
Meat is SOOOOO 2010.
I mean like people are different, maybe not a good different but whatever. Like You Do You Bebe Boo, but like don’t let like Her Disturb Your Word. Like it can’t interfere with like your life and space, and even your feed on the gram. If you didn’t gram it, it didn’t happen, remember. There cannot be meat in your feed. Maybe you can photoshop her out, or put parish Hilton’s face on hers. Oh like, of to yoga, kisses bebe
Its your party you have the right to be petty and not invite her
By the way all humans are omnivores by nature
invite her ,then spray her in red spray paint labelled ,"murderer"