why do situations feel different when i wake up?

sometimes in the evening i'm like "im going to do it" i feel focused and driven by a reason of change or hope.

but then i wake up, reality feels almost different like hyperaware. usually the thing i think about the most is the last thing i want to do or think about anymore. like for a moment i feel the opposite like a sickening feeling almost

what the hell is that? why when i open my eyes the thought of doing what i desire the most feels worse than death

i want to confess to someone tomorrow who i don't think shares my feelings but i can at least move on and find someone who does. but why do i always want to bottle these kinds of things when i wake up but feel fine in the evening? that's just an example. other things like getting my haircut or going to the gym like feels really awful in the morning but great in the evening. TF