I am a middle-aged adult and live 600 miles away from my parents. I haven’t seen them since last spring due to COVID-19 travel restrictions. I am busy and mad at them so I don’t want to see them anyway.
My mother keeps sending me gifts that I don’t want: chocolate squares with fruit filling (which I just take to the office and leave for my coworkers to take), bric-a-brac that I don’t want (such as mugs with cute sayings on them), and homemade food that is stale by the time it arrives.
I assume that I need to just thank her each time I get one of these unwanted gifts and just throw them away? There’s no way to politely get the gifts to stop?
Thanks.
Mother keeps sending me unwanted gifts?
2021-01-30 8:41 pm
回答 (14)
2021-01-31 1:59 am
✔ 最佳答案
This is tricky, because you probably feel bad about wanting to toss them, but it's equally true your mom probably loves putting this stuff together. Unless she works full time and is super busy, she probably feels like she has no purpose in life.Is there any way you could suggest that one type of gift be discontinued, but you truly appreciate the rest? For example, on the bric a brac, are there any local groups that have auction fundraisers? For me, it's always animal shelters or rescues. My sister is in a choral group and always gives them stuff like this for their auctions. Keep all of it until you find a group who would LOVE to have it.
Then figure out what to eliminate. If the candy goes to work, to me this is a plus. If her food arrives too stale to eat, clearly this is a negative.
2021-01-31 1:00 am
You should assume to resolve the differences you have with your parents. That is what the gifts are about, to show you that they think about you often and miss you. If you just stopped thinking about yourself for a second or two you would see that too and not only ACTUALLY be thankful for their efforts, return their love for you. Stop pouting.
Try talking to Mom and telling her you appreciate her efforts and give her a couple of ideas of what you might like to receive from her instead. Give her some direction and maybe make a generous offer to return the favor to her. Maybe there is something available where you live that isn't where she lives that she would value or like to experience for the first time.
Try talking to Mom and telling her you appreciate her efforts and give her a couple of ideas of what you might like to receive from her instead. Give her some direction and maybe make a generous offer to return the favor to her. Maybe there is something available where you live that isn't where she lives that she would value or like to experience for the first time.
2021-01-31 8:20 am
wish i had that problem, both my parents have been gone for yrs
2021-02-01 8:27 pm
Hello concerned one always thank her but at the same time just calmly respectfully let her know you appreciate the thought but you really don’t need anything else right now and be honest it’s always the best policy so she won’t send candy unnecessarily etc. If they don’t know how will they not send things? Always honor your parents that’s what they do to show their love and that they are thinking of you but they can’t read minds.
2021-01-31 11:56 am
Be grateful, some would die to be in that position....
Then, give the trinkets away and watch how happy you make people...it might do your grench heart some good.
Then, give the trinkets away and watch how happy you make people...it might do your grench heart some good.
2021-01-31 10:15 am
Be kind.. Thank her very much for being so thoughtful but tell her that you no longer eat desserts and junk food so please stop sending them. As for the mugs etc. inform her that you have your own style so save your money and buy herself something nice. Again Mom , thank you for being so thoughtful.
2021-01-30 11:09 pm
sounds like she is reaching out and you aint doing a good job of responding why ? who cares how you feel about them what could they have possibly done to ignore the woman who craving your attention
and gave you life ?
accept the gifts atleast talk to the woman you live 600 miles away what is the harm?
and to be honest you sound like a child you need to grow up a little bit and say hit to the woman who probably wont have much time to live on earth as long as you do ....
and gave you life ?
accept the gifts atleast talk to the woman you live 600 miles away what is the harm?
and to be honest you sound like a child you need to grow up a little bit and say hit to the woman who probably wont have much time to live on earth as long as you do ....
2021-01-31 12:57 pm
You can be polite and say, "Hey mom, I appreciate that you are thinking of me, however, it's not necessary to send gifts." Ask her to stop, if she doesn't, then continue to just donate/toss out the gifts.
2021-01-31 1:12 am
They feel really fortunate that they had you and they are counting their blessings.
2021-01-30 9:20 pm
You could tell her about the food - that you appreciate the thought but it arrives stale. And maybe mention that you're always glad to hear from her but please don't spend her money on you.
2021-01-30 8:56 pm
Among people who are very close to each other it's OK to respond to the 3rd or 4th gift of a mug with thanks for the mug and the information that you have plenty of mugs now and won't be needing any more for a good long time. With the chocolate, you can actually use the gift -- you have the pleasure of bringing a treat for your co-workers. With stale food, after the 3rd or 4th time you again thank the person for being thoughtful, being generous, but you feel like the person would want to know that food doesn't travel well and arrives is poor condition.
If someone is sending you wildly unsuitable gifts, gifts you have zero appreciation for, that someone probably has no idea what sort of gift you WOULD appreciate. Give this generous thoughtful person some tactful guidance in choosing gifts. Mention something like a co-worker bringing in Florida citrus for everyone and how delicious it was, like how much you enjoy XYZ magazine, like how you wish you had a red cashmere beanie, a blue silk scarf, some black lightweight woolen tights for chilly days, whatever. But if you leave your Mom with no idea what you might like, she will continue to send gifts that aren't what you'd like.
If someone is sending you wildly unsuitable gifts, gifts you have zero appreciation for, that someone probably has no idea what sort of gift you WOULD appreciate. Give this generous thoughtful person some tactful guidance in choosing gifts. Mention something like a co-worker bringing in Florida citrus for everyone and how delicious it was, like how much you enjoy XYZ magazine, like how you wish you had a red cashmere beanie, a blue silk scarf, some black lightweight woolen tights for chilly days, whatever. But if you leave your Mom with no idea what you might like, she will continue to send gifts that aren't what you'd like.
2021-01-30 9:13 pm
Do not open them, give them back to the mailman, and mark the package, "Return to sender", and x out your name and address.
2021-02-02 7:38 pm
I wish I had a parent that loved me enough to send me gifts.
:( So sad.
:( So sad.
2021-02-02 2:22 pm
Mark "Return to Sender - Addressee refused" and stick back in the mail.
收錄日期: 2021-04-24 08:10:48
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