What, are you 12? Grow up. You are butthurt that your loser son couldn't move in but now are trying to deflect that back on a stepdaughter that is about to give birth? Pathetic
I mean, it's just a week. And besides, it sounds like he declined your son moving in out of reasonable fear that he wouldn't ever move out. His daughter sounds responsible, your son, does not. And that is why you should agree.
letting her back to give birth is very different to allowing an unemployable stoned loser move in.
if i was in that situation your opinion would be irrelevant as you are clearly an idiot,
go ahead kick up a fuss, you will find your butt out on the street.
Let her go live with the baby daddy.
She seems independent and able to take care of herself which seems like her stay will be temporarily. Your son on the other hand seems like a free loading loser who will stay for years.
Babies can and do come early and quick, I really I wouldn't wait until the week she is due. I wouldn't want my daughter home alone about to give birth with nobody there to help her if something happened because that happened to me. My ex was deployed when I was pregnant and both of our mom's were coming for the birth (together). They lived in Michigan where we are from but we were stationed in Texas. My baby came a few weeks early though and my neighbor ended up taking me. Essentially, I had my first baby alone.
As long as I have a home, my kids regardless of their age have one too and my husband (who is step-dad to my older 2) would feel the same way. Fvck I've had foster kids who are well into adulthood now and if they need help .. we're here.
Baby daddy here is questionable.. really he should be staying with her for this so that's raising some red flags here.
Overall I call bs on your story.
You shall help daughter in law to deliver safely.
Then she will greatly love you back.
But, your son shall go thru therapy or hard training to improve himself.
Otherwise, he will bring you only miserable headaches.
It sounds like she's actually likely to return to her own home after she gives birth, unlike the stoner son. So, I would risk it. The request is reasonable. The bigger problem is the baby daddy, who will most likely disappear pretty soon.
There is a huge difference between a doper who doesn't want to support himself and a woman who is two weeks from giving birth and is fraught and exhausted. How long have you been married? How much do you dislike this woman? The right answer to a doper who refuses to support himself IS "no".
She's heavily pregnant, and doesn't have support to get her to medical care otherwise. What's wrong with you?
I don't even need to get my crystal ball out to predict a divorce in your future. What a horrible, spiteful woman you are and what a caring father your step-daughter has. You don't deserve him. I can totally see why he doesn't want your addict son in the house. You wouldn't be doing him any favors either by taking him in until he cleand up his act. You would really deny a young woman about to have her child support? Wow, just wow. Well, the solution is for your husband is to either go stay with his daughter to help out or put you out and take his daughter in.
Why don't you just dispatch your husband to go live with his daughter during that last week instead? The excuse about driving her to the hospital is pretty weak--but have you at all talked to her to find out why she is so anxious about it? Instead of just thinking of 'evening up the score' with your husband over your son? I think your priorities ought to be for the safety of mother and baby--and not your own hurt feelings. But I don't know the whole story, either.
You just seem to want to exercise some vindictiveness and not concern over the issues your step daughter may be experiencing. It's her first kid. Give her a break. And TALK to her AND your husband about these issues, don't let them fester into huge problems.
She chose to have sex, and get pregnant, so she NOW should be on her own. If both kids had different issues then I might say yes, but this is not the case. No to your son, and no to his daughter!
I think this should not be her dad's responsibility, or yours. They wanted to live that way his daughter, and the male who got her pregnant, so they should SOLVE their own problem!!!
Sounds like a heck of a mess: you want to refuse him because he refused you about your son? Your son sounds like a real loser and no one would want a pot head and drinker who doesn't fully support themself to move in.
The daughter doesn't sound much better: she's an unwed mom who hasn't got a stable home but is bringing another life into the world, doesn't trust her room mate, and the child's father isn't with her: why not! Where is HIS responsibility in this?
On top of all this, you are right to be concerned about any possible additional exposure to Covid, people are DYING from it.
Beware of "temporary moves",they have a tendency to become permanent. Also, are you prepared to have a newborn in your home as well? Do you have a dog? Imagine how much work a dog can be, then multiply it endlessly when concerning a baby.
Problem can be solved, easily, at least temporarily, when she goes into labor. ALL she has to do is to call her father, who will come running to transport her. So her reasons for wanting to move in with you just don't hold water.
She could even take a taxi to the hospital, as well.
So, if you don't want the burden for any or all of these reasons, say no. But don't expect to be justified in any way because your pothead , drinking bum of a son wasn't welcome by your husband. If you had accepted him into your home, you would have also been enabling him to continue in his loser life patterns, which I'm sure worries you and that you wouldn't knowingly want to contribute to his dysfunction.
So. Good luck! And tell your stepdaughter that she needs to call upon her absent lover/boyfriend to step up and take responsibility.
Who owns the house and who pays the bills? If you do, then you have the final say, but if he does, then he has the final say. Doesn't seem that big a deal though so I don't think you should worry about it. Let her stay until the birth. You said she has her own apartment so I don't see why she'd stay beyond what she said she would.
Once shes in she wont leave thats how this stuff works. good luck
Just tell him if she moves in he has to let your son move in!
Decline and remind him of his refusal regarding your son.,
It is fully appropriate for him to refuse to house to house an unemployed stoner.
In a covid world it is not appropriate for you to refuse this request.
A. Your reason to refuse is payback.
B. It makes total sense for her to be close for this event.
C. This is not a move in and stay situation and is NOT enabling.
D. It comes with a time limit. She goes home from the hospital.
You have no idea how hard it is to say he's right this time. he rarely is.
"He said no because one of my son doesn't work a full time job and tend to like to smoke weed and drink." so your son probably wouldn't have been making much of an effort to move out again if he is that way, would he? Wouldn't have kept the place he already has now, in order to return there at some pint?
Which is rather a different situation from being a pregnant woman close to giving birth whose plan it IS to return to her OWN apartment after hospital and the birth.
Cold world we live in....Daughter needs to stay permanently at least five to six years mother and child gonna need a lot of help. Comparing your son a man to a woman with child c'mon a man can live out there, find work a place to live even if in a homeless shelter. You're woman don't be mean take husbands daughter into your heart. If not you may be the one in the street.
Both offspring are irresponsible. This reminds me of me and my son. Perhaps if I had been more firm with him and his life choices he wouldn't have a blended family and a divorce with all the misery that comes with it. Your husband's problems are just starting because once that baby is born he will not be able to put it out. Your marriage will be tested, you must have known that. The baby's father should not be allowed to skate free on this either, I don't care what the excuse. Let the father move in with the daughter until the child is born. That would be the best solution but I suspect it will go different. Dads and daughters have a special relationship Grampa B
It's your job to care for kids grandma.
