It isn't fair to expect that your husband would behave the way you would have. He is not a mind reader. If you have a health issue you want to discuss with him, discuss it. If I've learned anything after being married for 27 years, it's that you can't expect him to know what you're thinking. That is just so unfair.
That is not how men work.
The problem is that you're expecting him to think and act like you. Men don't act like women. Men don't communicate to bond. We bond through physical behavior, not talking.
He talks to convey information. Nothing more. If you say nothing, he assumes there is nothing to say.
Now, do men have to learn that women don't work like that? Certainly.
But who is the dominant one in communications? You are.
He's dominant physically, and takes the lead on physical interactions. You must be the responsible party for communications. That means you have to understand him, BEFORE he can understand you.
Right now, you are not fulfilling your role in the relationship. He fights off burglars at night, and you foster loving communication. Everyone has a job.
So, if there is something important to say, say it. Don't expect him to guess at what you're thinking.
BTW, the next time you pick up something heavy, and call for him to do it for you, remind yourself that he's not resentful that you cannot pick up the heavy stuff. He's glad to help you.
You have to pick up the communication. He can't do it, any more than you can pick up something very heavy.
Good Luck!
Your husband is behaving like an adult and you are behaving like a child. What, must you wait for daddy to give you permission to talk? You're being passive-aggressive. Don't. It's childish and annoying.
Not necessarily. We men tend to be quite private about our health.
Perhaps he is affording you that same privacy, not realising you want him to inquire about such things.
Perhaps you should just tell him.
He likely thought it was an highly personal lady issue, and he was extremely considerate not to pry for obviously personal information. You are lucky to have such a sensitive and empathetic man for a husband. You chose wisely.
I can't comment on whether you husband "cares" or not. I will say this...it is mighty strange that he doesn't want to know FINE DETAILS about his wife's medical issues. When you have a romantic partner or husband/wife, it is wise and prudent to be up-to-date on any medical issues they are facing. For example, I have a girlfriend. When I met her I had NO known medical issues. But then I became really sick and checked myself into a hospital. Turns out I had a lot of hidden medical issues that didn't bother me enough to go get checked out, until those same issues just about killed me. Since I got sick, my girlfriend wants to know everything about my health. What my issues are, what my medications are, WHY I'm taking those specific medications, symptoms to look out for (if the medicine is not working), etc. She even wants to make sure that we always know where the closest hospitals are "just in case". It's so cute. I know in my heart that she wants to know all this information mostly because she loves me and wants me to be as healthy as possible, always. But as a practical matter...as the two of us plan to spend a lot of time together...she really needs to know how to best help me if I have any medical emergency. Now, it's unlikely that I'd ever have a severe medical emergency, as I'm on some good medication now that is working very well...and I'm very careful to take my medication as directed. But if my girlfriend had medical issues, I would want to know all about those issues as well. It's a practical matter. "Two heads are better than one". You should be able to depend on your partner to be your healthcare advocate when you are not necessarily feeling "well enough" to take care of yourself. Even if your husband is not a doctor, he should be VERY familiar with any and all medical issues of his wife, any medications his wife is taking, what those medicines are for, etc...
I'm confused how he would not ask any questions after a visit to an endo. There are no "minor" issues that an endo is concerned with.
If he's male not necessarily. It's in our nature as women to have both better communication skills but also to sometimes expect men to have the same, which in many cases they simply do not. So if you've got something to say just say it. You're playing a bit of a game here in wishing this guy was somehow different from the person you chose to marry.
No ity doesn't mean he doesn't care. What it does mean is that you two have different expectations on how you communicate and when.
Has it always been like this and how often do you ask "Did you even hear what I was saying?"
I guess, there is only one way to find out :
Tell him about your health from A to Z as colorful as you can imagine and then observe if he is following and able to remember later, lol
The thing is, if you're an emotional talker then maybe you tend to jump from one story line to another, and what's just a simple doctor visit for him, for you it could also involve a childhood memory recall, sitting in traffic, forgetting to send an email, texting in a waiting room, planning dinner, a broken nail on the door key you can never open without touching the wall and the one you've also asked like 50 times your husband to replace, and then of course health test results with all the vocabulary you hardly understand yourself.
But in a nutshell "it is okay" as he puts it in case it's too much information to digest all at once.
On a more serious note, tell him that it's important for you that he asks you about you.
It doesn't cost him anything, and it shows love and care you need and you just feel better.
And if you do get emotional talking about health, then all he just needs to do is to give you space to talk it out.
You need to spice up your relationship because you're way too comfortable being apart. Go out and adventure by maybe going on a hike or camping in the woods for a weekend. Spend more time together even if it is going out and to play bowling or enjoying a round of mini golf. Reinvigorate the spark of your relationship and If he disagrees then unfortunately I think you know what is next. You somehow need to force your relationship to spending time with each other and get rid of any distractions such as smartphones and televisions.
I agree with you, he should ask, i would
