How to Get Over Someone?
2019-07-25 4:36 am
A couple months ago, I met this girl where I worked at the time, and after a couple times I got the flirty vibe from her, I asked for her number, and we started talking for a few days, before we went out for coffee. The time that we spent texting, was very fun. We were both into each other, and everything seemed to be going smoothly, until the day, when nervousness took over. That confidence that I had before seemingly faded away, and I couldn't naturally flow the conversation, but that happens to me until I get used to someone. We spent over two hours together, and afterwards I didn't really hear from her, except the occasional "I was away from my phone," etc. Two days later she tells me that "our personalities are too far different to pursue things further," and tells me just to get over it. That was the last Ive ever heard from her. Ive been sitting here wondering what happened, and what caused her to do this, but she just left, but I can't get her out of my mind, because I'm stuck on the thought there has to be something I can do. I'm 18, and she is 19, but most think I am older because of how I look and act. I'm also a Conservative, and try to live by these values to the best of my ability. She was definitely a younger vibes person, and I didn't really give that vibe off, but still, two hours to me, isn't enough time to know someone, but maybe to her, it was. I just want to know how others get people out of their minds, because I get attached really easily.
回答 (3)
2019-07-25 5:32 am
It's going to take 4-8 months, and depends ENTIRELY on NOT allowing your mind to dwell on thinking about them.
At first, it is all about the fantasy. We are not close enough TO get on each other's nerves.
But how to get over ... by turning your mind AWAY from thoughts of her, consistently, every time. For 4-8 months. Gradually you create a NEW brain habit of NOT thinking about her, and it eventually becomes stronger than the habit you created OF thinking about her.
You have just spent a whole lot of time writing out this question ... dwelling on thoughts OF her, which only makes your habit stronger and it will take longer now TO get over her.
Also, when we meet someone, we see only the infatuation and mistake it as the lasting reality. And so we get this fantasy in our head about how it is going to be, which has nothing to do with how it will end up. But we don't like to let go of the fantasy.
The truth is that couples who CAN make it work DO MAKE IT WORK. A break up means that one of you has discovered that the fantasy is false and that it isn't going to work between you.
At first, it is all about the fantasy. We are not close enough TO get on each other's nerves.
But how to get over ... by turning your mind AWAY from thoughts of her, consistently, every time. For 4-8 months. Gradually you create a NEW brain habit of NOT thinking about her, and it eventually becomes stronger than the habit you created OF thinking about her.
You have just spent a whole lot of time writing out this question ... dwelling on thoughts OF her, which only makes your habit stronger and it will take longer now TO get over her.
Also, when we meet someone, we see only the infatuation and mistake it as the lasting reality. And so we get this fantasy in our head about how it is going to be, which has nothing to do with how it will end up. But we don't like to let go of the fantasy.
The truth is that couples who CAN make it work DO MAKE IT WORK. A break up means that one of you has discovered that the fantasy is false and that it isn't going to work between you.
2019-07-25 5:07 am
Evidently, something occurred that turned her off, and she was either too embarrassed or polite, or something else, to explain it to you, to tell you the truth. It might have helped you put some closure on things, if you actually knew what it was that did this. Your clue was the "nervousness" you described, perhaps.
How you get over someone is to give it time. You keep busy. You socialize elsewhere. And sooner or later, you won't even remember her, or her name.
Be sure to avoid the conviction that it was your "fault" in some way, it just might not have been so.
Good wishes,
How you get over someone is to give it time. You keep busy. You socialize elsewhere. And sooner or later, you won't even remember her, or her name.
Be sure to avoid the conviction that it was your "fault" in some way, it just might not have been so.
Good wishes,
2019-07-25 4:38 am
gr a pair of balls and get over it
收錄日期: 2021-05-01 22:07:23
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