My mum ruined a t-shirt that holds special meaning and memories and I can't stop being upset about it.?

You won’t get over it. You can move on and not make it take over your life and thoughts.

My guess is that this happens regularly - these thoughts take over. Therapy can help prevent you from dwelling and spiraling so badly.


I’m sorry this happened and hope you are able to find peace quickly.

And how did she ruin this shirt? Perhaps by being the person who does your laundry for you?

Your mom didn't do it on purpose, right?* Stop blaming your mom and accept that it's happened, but at the same time you are allowed to be sad about it, just don't turn it into a big production AT your mom.

I don't know if it's a generational thing or something I can't remember having grown out of, but judging from questions I see on here and other similar sites an awful lot of you think that there's some sort of secret reset code and a magical way to "get over things." There's neither. All throughout your life things will happen that you wish hadn't and cannot be undone from small to soul-wrenchingly awful. You will only hurt yourself by thinking that there's a way to make yourself feel exactly like you did before and you will hurt yourself even more if you think that there's a timetable involved. It's more like a process of reconciliation with reality and a fading of the negative feelings.

*There are dysfunctional families out there where constantly destroying or giving away favorite things accidentally on purpose is a thing. That's something completely different that you can't start recovering from until you get away and establish some boundaries.

by realizing that your mom is more important than any shirt, and accidents happen, maybe you can replace that shirt but you cant replace your mom, youre so lucky to still have her around, wish i did

do you want your t or your mom