I wrote a poem for my gf. Is it any good? Suggestions?

[匿名]

2017-11-12 3:35 am

My dear sweetheart
I really feel like my life did just start
You are always on my mind
I have never met anyone of your kind

You are unbelievably beautiful
Not having met you earlier makes me feel like a fool
Words cannot express
What I felt when you said “yes”

You mean so much to me
With you I really feel free
You are my sweetheart day by day
I will always carry you with me, in whichever what way

All of you is what I need
And together we will succeed
I look forward to our next moment together
With you, life cannot become any better

My name

Is it any good?

回答 (2)

[匿名]

2017-11-12 10:32 am

✔ 最佳答案

Its OK,but I suggest you wait a year or two to give it to her.
Imagine how you'll feel if you break up before then.

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Cogito

2017-11-12 3:45 am

Sorry, but it's dire.
The rhymes are all very forced, it doesn't scan and if I had a poem like that given to me, I'd throw up and ditch the writer.

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