Reporting to social services?

i think thats a good idea to report her to social services, the kids shouldnt have to suffer cause of her

1. your sister in law needs therapy not cps down her throat

2. you're making excuses for your brother for cheating on his wife (shame on you)

3. Your brother is NOT innocent in this mess - he knows how to clean -so you go ahead and call and get your brother in trouble (good job thinking like that)

4. When your husband cheats on you because (insert excuse here) remember - its ok because (insert excuse here) - PS: ITS NOT OK

5. I wonder how you would feel if your husband cheated on you with a coworker and then had to sit at home and think of him with her every single day - it would wear on you too, honey, you are NOT perfect

if you do feel really badly? then you will go over to your sister in laws house and help her - by cleaning and helping her feel better about herself because your selfish brother was a total jerk off!!! and you should be defending your sister in law (PS: this usually results in KARMA where you get cheated on and know how it feels so you will be able to relate with your sister in law who did NOT deserve to be cheated on

How dare you sit and feel badly you let your brother cheat, knew about it and did nothing about it - now your upset your sister in law has lost her mind over it, and your ticked off at her (shame on you)

Your brother sounds like a useless dick if life with her is so bad he wouldn't have stayed all those years. And so what if she yells at him thats what couple's do. And if you were so concerned you should have stayed at the house and helped her clean. You seem to not have gave a **** about your nephew because you didn't run out the door after him did you? Its people like you that cant mind their damn business you didn't say she beat the kids or molesting them and just remember they are your brother kids too. Maybe you should spend more time helping by staying out the way. You aren't sure if you should call because you really don't have a reason too. And come on a chinchilla in the toilet bullshit do you even know how much it cost to adopt one. You and your mum need some good dick and you guys won't have all that time on your hands to be evil petty wankers/witches

Well, you could call CPS, and they are going to wonder why your brother isn't caring for his own children...or is he just out having a big old ball with his girlfriend? Seven kids is a lot of kids, and some of them are special needs. Your brother needs to put his ---- back in his pants and take care of his children. While he's at it, he ought to be doing something for the wife he humiliated and hurt.

So she's taking care of seven (!) special needs kids, with in-laws who say, "Oh, yeah, he cheated but his wife's a drag to be around, so you have to understand he's entitled to his happiness, too!" Yeah, you guys are real supportive. I can't imagine why she's suicidal. I hope you're trolling, if not you may be the most insensitive wench posting today.

I hope you never have to care for seven kids while YOUR spouse is putting it to somebody else, dear. AND having his family justify it. You people are dreadful.

If you wanted to do something helpful (though it's clear you DON'T) why don't you take custody of a couple of the children temporarily so they have a little less to deal with? Or maybe offer to help them re-home some of the pets they can't keep up with. How hard would it have been for instance, to scoop the chinchilla from the toilet, stick him in his cage and take him home with you?

She needs medical help as she's demonstrating by her suicidal tendencies
and acute depression.
Her husband needs to get her the help she so desperately needs.
Family and friends should also rally round and help with the children and animalsand offer her support.

There is no reason for you to call social services, try being understanding of how devastating, betrayed and hurt she feels discovering her husband has been cheating. Regardless of what she did or how mean she was to your mom and family there is no excuse for your brother to cheat on her, he did that because he wanted to be with the other woman and used her bad attitude as an excuse for his own terrible behavior. If you cant offer sister in law some help getting her home in order and a kind shoulder or ear then you need to mind you own business.

She needs a lot of help for every area of her life. The children need a safe environment. I would guess that she needed help for depression when your brother cheated. His responsibility was to help her get well, not find comfort elsewhere. Depression often manifests in an ANGRY way. How can you and your family help her? There are many options, but if no one is able to support her life in a major way, you do need to call social services. CPS is not punishment. They will protect the kids and they will steer her to help. Be sure to tell them that she has voiced suicide ideation. I see that you are only 19 and in college. You can't wear this on your back. Push your mom or some older people to take action. You are too young and you need to focus on school and being a happy healthy young person.

It's a hard decision to make.

Thing is ... "what - if" something awful happens (which could have been prevented) ?

In many areas - it is against the law for persons not to report abuse if you see it ... not reporting abuse is enabling it - and allowing it to go on.

Consider talking to a person who is familiar with this type of situations .. they may can give you good advice on how to proceed.

Firstly, you do realise that your saint of a hard done by Brother lives there too, don't you? So why isn't HE noticing what's going on and helping to get the house and those kids in order? Seems like your so perfect Brother isn't as good a man as you seem to think.
If she is neglectful why isn't he stepping into the breach, after all they are HIS KIDS TOO. Or is he still really wrapped up in thinking of himself that he doesn't notice - or care? If she is having trouble coping with the emotions HIS AFFAIR CAUSED why isn't he seeking help for her? Where is he accepting responsibility for what he chose to do (and there's ALWAYS a choice made)?
So she was "very demanding to him"? Well with 7 kids to raise, did he expect her to do it on her own? So he found someone else "who reminded him of how his wife use to be and she was just there for him", so it didn't matter that having a family of 7 kids was at least part of the reason she didn't have as much time and effort for him alone? Thinking of it that way, sounds real mature of your brother. doesn't it?
"Nobody knows what goes on behind closed doors", so you cannot know how he has treated his wife and family, only what he tells you. She may have been angry at your family because of what he has said to her, or because he treats you with far more attention and respect than he offers her, his wife.
You supported him in cheating so that tells me you probably didn't like her much from the start which would make it hard for her to like you either. Have you ever considered that?
How would you feel if your spouse was seeing someone else? Left you with 7 kids to care for? Had zero time to come to terms with that AND he's still working where he cheated and that was eating you up inside? That his family knew and even if they didn't condone it, certainly didn't make any effort to stop it after all she was so mean to him - and them. You have no empathy for what she is going through. Hope it never happens to you.
Well if "shes just neglecting everything and feel really bad", are you prepared to do anything to help out? After all they are your nieces and nephews. You realise if you call social services then your Brother risks losing the kids too, since he also should be aware of how they were living, and didn't do anything about it?