Please correct the below grammar.
In my understanding, ABC Co. is a quite new and in developing company. I believe that ABC Co. can provide me an advancement opportunity for my career plan, and it also attracts me to apply the said job is the idea "Green products" of ABC which is the meaningful mission. So, I would expect to grow with ABC family together and further developing the green products for returning to the world. I think I can get job satisfaction during work with ABC.
My current working company is a big but a conservative company. They are not willing to put more resource for further development and improvement on the technology and capability. Thus, I would like to look for a challenging and innovative job and let me using my past working experience and knowledge benefit to the company and motivating force toward to my career plan.
The main point is that the job is more challenging, but the achievable working environment is a motivator. No matter the project or the management can let me continue to achieve the goal. I like to solve problems and improve the working environment. On the other hand, if the non-logical task and loss of direction of the work environment is the reason I lost motivation.
英文高手請進 please help to correct English grammar?
2017-01-04 7:32 am
回答 (2)
2017-01-04 11:32 am
✔ 最佳答案
Sorry實在有太多不合句法和文法語句不對的地方和很多多餘或用錯的字，請恕我不詳解釋，只按你原文大意內容改寫了，你自己留意比較寫法用詞的分別，我想像會跟你"中文句式想法"會有一點點感覺不像你要說的"話"，但這便是你要開始學習從"英文寫作"說話，而不單是把中文思想填上英文字句。有些明顯的中文思詞: 例如：
grow with the ABC family "together"(英文不會加上together這樣表達，因為growth with已經包含"雙方同時"的意義，唯有中文才要"一起"，因為中文沒有with這種前置詞/片語詞)
returning to the world(英文找不到這種寫法的。你的意思"回饋世界"或"回饋社會"等亦是會用FOR這個前置詞表達你的行為是"為了"世界便可以了。
有些主要的文法規則先給你指出：凡當你把兩樣東西用AND連著在一句中，之後的動詞便必定是眾數詞ARE，所以小心你"思想"時這兩樣東西是否真的AND在一齊來結合表示，假如這"你想像作兩樣"的東西其實真是兩件或兩種非常不同或對立的情況，便不要AND了它們。
其中一句achievable working environment 我無法你的用意/意思，所以(?)沒有修改。我猜想你的意思是"有目標的職責"goal oriented work。另外注意working enviornment這英語詞是指公司的工作環境(屬於行政或人事部門的責任)，我猜想你以中文的意思來表達，但這詞在英語是指公司對員工提供的支援或配套，甚至是企業文化的管理層跟工作人員的關係。下兩句說到你"like to improve the working environment"便表示你喜歡改變改良公司的文化或永遠不會滿足於公司提供的配備，但要看你申請的工作是否這職責，還是只是執行公司發展產品的某一個步驟而已。假如你仍覺得沒表達錯的話，我會改用working condition來調低所涵蓋的闊度，只是講到你職位工作範疇內的"小環境"(condition)，而不是公司企業的"大環境"(environment)。
最後一句On the other hand....我覺得沒有必要這樣"附注"，雖然好像很坦白表示你亦有對工作的"負面"的因素，但我相你在前段你對舊公司的評價已經很"充足"，看你這申請的人已經看得出你"來工作是要公司"適應你"的發展目標和滿足感而不是來"發展這公司的產品"。
由於這平台無法設置不同字體，我改寫了的會用"全大寫"，但減掉改動的字句則你自己留意了。[注：由於有些原句詞的組合難以既留用又修正，有些句可能仍不是全合規格的。]
祝你好運！
In my understanding, ABC Co. is a new and developing company. ABC Co. attracts me to apply THIS job is the idea "Green products" AS the meaningful mission. So, I would expect to grow with THE ABC family and IN further developing the green products FOR the world. FOR THIS REASON ALONE, I think I can get job satisfaction during work with ABC.
My current working company is a big but conservative company. They are not willing to put more resource for further development and improvement on the technology and capability. Thus, I would like to look for a challenging and innovative job and let me USE my past working experience and knowledge TO benefit the WORLD and THIS IS A motivating force toward to my career plan.
MY main point is that THIS job is more challenging, but the achievable working environment (?) is a POSITIVE motivator FOR ME. I TRUST THAT the project OF YOUR PRODUCT DEVELOPMENT or YOUR management can let me continue to achieve THIS goal. I like to solve problems and improve the working environment. On the other hand, non-logical task and loss of direction of the work environment ARE the reasonS I lost motivation.
2017-01-04 8:09 am
Line 1: 'in' should be deleted
Line 3: 'said' should be 'concerned'
Line 5: add a'the' in front of ABC
'During work' should be 'by working'
'A' should be deleted in front of 'conservative'
Line 3: 'said' should be 'concerned'
Line 5: add a'the' in front of ABC
'During work' should be 'by working'
'A' should be deleted in front of 'conservative'
收錄日期: 2021-04-11 21:31:28
原文連結 [永久失效]:
https://hk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20170103233209AAl0Sg1