I've suffered from anxiety since i was 13 (I'm 17 now) I threw up outside a classroom and then continued to throw up everyday for 4 months and lost a total of 3.5 stone. I got hypnotherapy for that and now my symptoms of nausea have stopped. However I still get bouts of anxiety and obsessive thinking, now what seems to be troubling me is my depression, it was your "average" depression for a while and then it's just gotten worse and worse.
I have been under CAMHS (mental health service for children) It went fine but I just kept getting worse after, I dropped out of sixth form college in early 2016 to restart this september, i have restarted but nothing has changed, i'm actively suicidal and hate everyone and myself.
My depression has taken a turn where not only I want to harm myself but other people too and have fantasies about murdering people, knowing I would never actually do it because I'm a very compassionate person? I seem to either be one extreme or another, either extremely kind or extremely horrible and having no control of it is making me go into despair.
If i dropped out of college now then i would have no future at all and would have to stay in a low level job i hate and eventually kill myself anyway?
So i'm wondering whether to just do it now with less burden and responsibility clinging to me, what holds me back is im very close with my friends and parents i love them more than anything however i also hate myself more than anything so i'm very stuck.Any thoughts?
Need help/advice/opinions on my mental illness?
2016-11-08 9:40 am
回答 (2)
2016-11-08 1:42 pm
✔ 最佳答案
Hi. Please call your CAMHS clinic and ask to speak to the on call care coordinator. Tell them that you are feeling suicidal and they will help you. If you are a danger to yourself it's a medical emergency so call 999 and ask for an ambulance. Childline is there for anyone under 20 so please give them a call and speak to one of their counsellors whenever you're feeling distressed or just need to talk. You can get better and suicide is not the answer. Please take care of yourself x 
2016-11-08 10:13 am
It depends. What is the origin for all these. When did this trouble start.
When you were 13, you should have avoided illegitimate desires. It would have stopped your several "throw-ups". The root cause for all anxieties is illegitimate desire. You should know this fact. Now it is too late. It is an after thought or late realization. It is now compulsory for you to take some drastic steps in right direction immediately without fail. Please consult a psychiatrist forthwith and take proper and regular treatment.
By the way, are these dreams seen by you during your "silent sleep". Were you than in deep sleep.
When you were 13, you should have avoided illegitimate desires. It would have stopped your several "throw-ups". The root cause for all anxieties is illegitimate desire. You should know this fact. Now it is too late. It is an after thought or late realization. It is now compulsory for you to take some drastic steps in right direction immediately without fail. Please consult a psychiatrist forthwith and take proper and regular treatment.
By the way, are these dreams seen by you during your "silent sleep". Were you than in deep sleep.
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