What jobs can I do being epileptic?

Through my eyes as someone who used to have epilepsy, there is not much at all you can do unless your serizures are 100% controlled. If they aren't, I wouldn't even trust you to safely cook burgers at McDonalds. You could collape during a seizure and hit your face in the grill. The most you could do without putting yourself and others in danger is an office job. For your job options, it truly depends on your triggers for seizures and hiw well you are controlled. If staring at a screen for hours and flashing lights don't trigger seizures for you, become a software engineer.

You'd think I would be supportive of people with epilepsy due to once having it. But I am able to look at it from both sides. Unless you are 100% controlled, I don't believe people with an active diagnosis of epilepsy should ever drive or have a job that would out the individual's and others' lives in danger.

Epilepsy sucks and makes dealing with cancer seem easy.

Virtually any of them. There are likely restrictions on jobs where other people's safety is concerned (Bus driving, fire fighting) but other wise it's not a crippling disability.

Cocktail shaker?

You can do anything anyone else can do as long as you are being treated.