Im worried my boyfriend isn't that into me, heres why?

I disagree with these other people answering. I don't think he's That Into You he sounds like he thinks you're okay for now but he could do better but he will keep you until a girl comes along who is better. When a guy's nuts about a girl he will do pretty much anything (within reason of course yours are reasonable). that's what I've learned from many years of dating. I dated a few guys who acted not that into me and I made excuses for them for example theyre selfish or that's how they are. But then after me they met girls they were crazy about and they did whatever they wanted and treated them in the way they never treated me. By the way this is advice for relationships not marriage. Most men become lazy and show the behavior you described when married that is to be expected but not during dating

How about growing up? Do you seriously not realize that every man is different? Some are great lovers and some are lazy. Some like oral and some don't. It has nothing to do with you. It is all about him. If this bothers you, then you don't want a permanent committment to this guy.

I don't think his lack of affection necessarily means he's not into you. Some people aren't terribly affectionate for whatever reason. And not everyone likes oral sex or giving back rubs or whatever, so there's that too. My husband isn't super affectionate, nor is he very into oral sex, but I know he's totally into ME because he shows me in other ways. Maybe you need to think harder about what your bf does to show you he's into you and not just in the bedroom. If you decide he's lame in other areas too, then trust your instincts.

The ball is in your court. He has the kid, you don't. He has the financial problems too, you don't. If he is not meeting your needs don't marry him. There are plenty of guys out there who would be more than happy to go down on you and give you massages in return for some good sex and head. I fear you are a wasted woman on a very selfish man.

Move on. There's plenty of men out there who would love to do the things your boyfriend isn't into doing. It sounds like he's too hung up on himself to give you what you need.

Some guys aren't into eating pu55y. It sounds like your guy is one of those. If it's important to you to have your pu55y eaten and have it eaten well and often, then ditch this guy and find one who loves to eat pu55y. It's not that hard to find such a guy.

Yes every guy is different... I couldn't imagine having sex without going down on a girl... It turns me on so much that I would rather give oral than get it any day of the week. You have to give a little to get a little... He may want to try something that you'll be hesitant to try down the road and he isn't putting all his ducks in a row. I'm not just talking about the oral either, the massages , foot rubs and all that jazz are something you do with your significant other and no one else and you should never feel guilty to ask him for any of it. Obviously I don't know the extent of the situation but it sounds to me like he wants you to move in for financial reasons ( helping to pay rent) and maybe to help take care of his kid. My advice would be to move on... There are so many wonderful guys who are caring and respectful who will give you exactly what you want and more. You ever wonder why he is divorced... Regardless of why he tells you all of what you're feeling could be why.

I don't like giving oral, I don't even like watching it in porn, I always skip it. And you shouldn't be comparing him to past relationships so much, it's not fair.

" I don't get why my boyfriend isn't into it."

"He told me once it bothers his head and give him headaches."

You've answered your own question. Not ALL guys enjoy giving oral, just as not all women enjoy giving.

"He also never gives me massages, foot rubs, backs rubs or anything like guys in the past have and doesnt seem interested."

Again, not all guys enjoy doing these types of things. You need to stop comparing him to guys from your past. He is who he is, and if you aren't happy with him with how he is, then you need to break it off and find someone that better suits you. It's not fair of you to expect him to change just to keep you happy.

Move on, I don't think it's going to work for you.

Perhaps he's like me I hate when woman are shaved. Shaved is for wimps, and I think it's gross. And it's a myth that shaved is cleaner. Infact it can have negative consequences. Try being like a real woman and let that whisker biscuit grow.

Your boyfriend does love you, but you need to understand that every guy has a different way of showing it. If he doesn't like eating you out, then it doesn't matter. Explain to him that you think he isn't attracted to you because of it, and ask him to at least try, for you. If you want to spend the rest of your life with him, no problem, i hope it works out. No guy is perfect. Relationships aren't about finding the right person, it's about loving the person you've found.

Best of luck!
~Claire

Sounds to me like you and he just happen to have different sexual preferences.

If he were not that into you, he wouldn't be "eager" for you to move in with him.

You're incompatible. If you're having to struggle with it now, it will only get worse. Move on.

HE IS NOT INTO YOU. You move in your going to be a babysitter and a sugar mamma that's all. And no offense but guys wanted to go down on you nothing will stop them no matter how nice. You may think it looks and smells. Time to move on.

Move on!

He is just using you for childcare and money!

I'm guessing your young and have lots going for yourself, but that's about to sadly stop. You are going to be continually dissatisfied and unhappy because of the one sided sex life you have with your bf. Do you want to end up like many other women on here complaining about a decade of poor sex with their partner? I bet he also never supports his child, but is eager for you to move in to share the cost and possibly borrow money on a regular basis. Big mistake if you were to move in with something like this already hanging over you. The very fact that he's already lying to you about going down on you causing him a headache is just the start of many more lies to come. It's self evident that you care far more for him than he's ever going to care for you or whether your sexually satisfied. You need only tell him that you decided not to move in because you want to keep your independence and watch your relationship[ massively fall apart before your very eyes. This guy is a leech that will drain you not only of your self respect but also your hard earned cash and anything else he can get his hands on.
At the end of your Q you wrote. Im not being shallow but do not want to marry a man who is not as physically into me as I am into him. What should I do?
You should run fast in the opposite direction to this loser that will end up leaving you in the same position as his ex. A single mom trying to raise her child as best she can with very little cash. You on the other hand have a unique opportunity as you've got a good job that pays well, and know what you'd like outer life at this point, so don't jeopardise all that for some loser that will happily drag you down with himself.

I'm in the same situation sorta. Except sex has not brought up yet. We been dating for five months.
I think our reason why we aren't like, "closer" is because we don't hang out enough to get super close. We hang out like once every two weeks about but we see each other four days out of the week at our job. All we do is kiss and he tells me nothing will ever change between us and blah blah.
I feel your boyfriend is just waiting for a different girl to come so he isn't left single.
If I were you I would dump him before he dumps you.
I'm sorry. I know you love him but you can find someone more respectful towards you. A guy who will treat you like a princess and you will be able to treat him like prince.
Good luck girl xx

Dump him

OH MY WORLD! WHY ARE YOU EVEN BOTHERED TO BE 'Nice down there'??? WHY ARE YOU " more than happy to give him bus and enjoy doing so although he's more into sex than oral"??????? IT IS NOT YOUR JOB TO BE A ******* SEX DOLL FOR FILTHY DICKHEADS. IT'S NOT YOUR JOB TO BE "very beautiful and smell great down there". THIS CONCEPT IS SO ******* COMPLETELY WRONG. LIVE FOR YOURSELF NOT FOR SOME MEN WHO WANT KINKY SEX/JUST YOUR BODY & NOT TO LOVE YOU. YOU ARE NOT A ******* SEX TOOL FOR ANY GUY. YOU ARE FOR YOURSELF. SOMEONE THAT LOVES YOU TRULY WON'T LOVE YOU FOR THE SEX BUT FOR YOUR PERSONALITY. FOR ****'S SAKE!!!!! EVERY GIRL SHOULD BE TREATED WITH RESPECT & AFFECTION BY A GENTLEMAN. IF HE ISN'T, GO FIND SOMEONE ELSE BC THERE IS DEFINITELY SOMEONE WHO CAN TREAT YOU BETTER.

it c0uld be that y0u have been with s0 many men bef0re him. that is a turn 0ff, and f0r many men it is a dealbreaker. the fact that y0u have m0re wealth t0 c0ntribute t0 the relati0nship c0uld cause s0me men t0 0verl00k that aspect 0f y0u, bc they will n0t have t0 pr0vide f0r y0u. men, especially 0nes 0f the rank 0f gentlmen 0r ab0ve w0uld never financially supp0rt a w0men with a pers0nality and past like that. they w0uld marry them but 0nly if the w0men c0ntributes m0re t0t hte relatinship finajcially...usually in the f0rm 0f d0wry but there are ther ways as well.
chances are that he is n0t f0nd 0f d0ing that..perf0rming 0ral sex 0n w0men. als0 it is very bad t0 c0mpare him t0 0ther men y0u have g0ne t0 bed with. that is 0ne 0f the reas0ns why m0st men w0nt marry w0men wh0 behave like that. It decreases their value in mens eyes. If y0u want him t0 be "m0re int y0u" then y0u sh0uld never talk ab0ut th0se things unless he asks. cut th0se pe0ple and 0her pe0ple wh0 kn0w b0ut them 0ut 0f y0ur life and h0pe he d0esnt bring hem up.

You show me a man who doesn't eat pu$$y and ill show you a home a can wreck

Dear I'm worried...

Geezzz...from what I have understood from your statements "What your asking, is within prospective". It's a simple balance between to partners. Do not misconstrue my statement, as any pleasure requested and is knowingly between both partners the pendulum swings both ways.

My advise to you would be " tell him to see an established Chiropractor for his neck". And relocate .

Maybe he just don't like giving head some people don't like that ! Just turn into a lesbian lol.

Stop comparing him to other guys. Maybe he's really different and doesn't like to give oral. I don't know, why don't you ask him why he doesn't want oral and tell him you feel he's not into you as much as you are into him and see what he says.

He may not be into that sort of stuff but he's into you. You both have different preferences which is normal. These need sorting before you move in together

You should have 3 or 4 men to pleasure you. They will all be different.

Since you are in a relationship with him i think you should confront him. You deserve better if you feel you do! Goodluck

I wouldn't even bother with him

Massages and back rubs are a chore unless they lead to sex and even then only if you haven't had sex with the girl before and it's part of the seduction. Feet are disgusting and are not to be touched. Licking vaginas is great to watch when another girl does it. Moving in with anybody is a sure way to kill any romance in a relationship, especially if you have to look after their kid for them. Loving people romantically is a self delusion disguising one's own desperate need to be coupled, as driven by the animalistic instinct for procreation.

You didn't give us your age, which is okay, but you sound young. With that being said, i don't think you should settle for a guy who doesn't give you what you desire. There are more guys out there who could fulfill your needs and you wouldn't have to beg him to do things for you. You just need to find your match. Of course there is no such thing as the perfect guy, but there is a "perfect guy for you". All men aren't the same but many have some similarities. There are guys who are into oral and giving their significant other back and foot massages. I would not think that it's "petty" of you to leave your boyfriend over this because we all want to be happy with someone who makes us happy. I hope you understand this and i hope i helped. Good luck with whatever decision you decide to make!

What's wrong with him? Who wouldn't want to go down on a nice clean muff? You should find someone who appreciates your sex appeal. You should find someone who will delight in giving you oral pleasure.

Yea Hun I would leave this guy

sounds like a not very nice guy

He is not into it. Just accept. He doesn't hate you. It's a move he doesn't like.

He is who he is. Why do you assume it's about you?

Just tell him what you want simple as that Ik it sounds absurd but a guy would love that that's being honest like most relationship I think that's the strongest indicator of making things work. If you leave him and just tell him why without telling him while your in the relationship for a chance to make things work it works wonders I promise from there you can see how much he really loves you and what he'll do for you.

You said many guys did, since you had many things in it, I wouldn't even spit on it.. I wouldn't put my penis in it, thank him if he did. We, guys see like you girls like used socks. Would you wear if you found a stinky socks somewhere??? Answer yourself, nobody sees you more than a sexual object

If it's because of your looks that the guys told that you were beautiful having looks does not a reason to be beautiful and you shouldn't and don't have to have to have looks to be beautiful.

just tell him what you want simple as that ik it sounds absurd but a guy would love that that's being honest like most relationship i think that's the strongest indicator of making things work... if you leave him and just tell him why without telling him while your in the relationship for a chance to make things work it works wonders i promise from there you can see how much he really loves you and what he'll do for you...

perhaps he's like me i hate when woman are shaved... shaved is for wimps, and i think it's gross... and it's a myth that shaved is cleaner... infact it can have negative consequences... try being like a real woman and let that whisker biscuit grow...

L

It is hard to tell I would talk to him and ask him. Because if he did had a baby that could be hard, or maybe he doesn't want only s*x be glad because most guys do.

its ok try 2 understand him, talk with him

Some guys had bad past experiences going down on a girl...like the smell of it. And some guys just don't like it just like some girls hate giving bjs...talk to him about it more. You need to tell him what u like that oleasesu

Girl give up or strait up ask him

You are a very dirty s lut.

One, every guy is different. Two, grow up.

you know, I think that whether he's that into you are not is not so much the question as that you already know you aren't happy with him in many ways. sounds like you should move on but there are a lot of factors involved and it's your choice. do what feels right for you.

Guys act disinterested to make you more interested

Who gives a toss about your five minute relationship

He just wants to **** u ...but i love to go down

maybe he's looking for a future not a girl to play wirh. you don't need sex to feel happy together. ..maybe he's asexual

I don't think you've given enough details that prove he's not into you, you've only mentioned oral, which in my opinion your lucky he's not into oral. A guy that doesn't want oral = a sigh of relief. BUT if you have other reasons for why you feel this way such as h'e rather do everything else than be with you then maybe you'd want to evaluate the relationshp a bit more

let go

It could just be that he doesn't enjoy doing that. Not all men do.

Ask him what he likes to do to a woman and then you have your answer.

Well if he wants you to move in, he has to like you. Who says you even need to get married? Just live together. Marriage never really works out anyways.

I don't think the problem is that he isn't into you, its that you keep comparing him to your past boyfriends. He just isn't comfortable giving you head, that doesn't mean he isn't into you.

Verga

He doesnt want u

He dounds dim

o dif sdfinsdf sdfinsidfn sdf nsdifn sidfn sdif

You need to sit down n talk to him.
If he's not into u, get the hell out form his life n move on.
Otherwise, maybe he's trying to please u in his own ways.

seems like he is not into you

Do you want to just be a sex object for him or a person he cares about?

Ttt

Go and marry another man!

He loves you.

Idk

He wouldn't be with you if he didn't want you.

some guys like it some dont

Weird

He may just not be in the mood at the moment

ask him directly why is he behaving so

uuu

Try butt-*******

Only you know sweetheart. As long as you're happy

You're on a losing wicket there sister. Move on.

As you cannot accept him as he is, call it a day and move on,
so he can find someone who will.

Lol

i don't eat pu$$y, then again i'm hung like an elephant and can pound away for hours. i rule.

not every guy likes to go downtown-that's OK-don't have to go there yourself either for him-a blessing
enjoy

Maybe he just doesn't like doing oral. I don't really care for my boyfriend going down on me, we always just skip to penetration right away because that's the fun part. Maybe he just likes to get on with it? BTW, have you even asked him for massages or whatever? Guys aren't mind readers. They know you think they are but they aren't. He's not going to know what you want unless you tell him. And if you're not a hairy mess "down there" it's probably a preference thing, that's all.

I have some weird advice. I noticed you wrote that you shave down there. I have a feeling you probably shave right before he goes down on you. The bad news is that little hair bits can kind of get stuck around there (like in the middle), no matter how much you rinse it. xD You can rinse it for an hour and I swear, it's hopeless.

So the best thing to do, is to shave a day before and have a bath after you do. Then right before it's time for oral, have another quick bath just to make it nice. That way, by the time it's "game time" lol, those baths and extra time after the shave will make it hair-bits free. It will be really clean but also won't have any left overs from the close shave a day prior. Btw, I learned this the hard way. If you shave and shower at the same time and then go into bed with him, there will be something you missed ...yep.

Trust me, even the tiniest little cut stand of hair...even if it's a teeny tiny little piece stuck in the crevice lol, he will know and it will be gross. It doesn't have to be a full hair, it's the tiny shaving bits I mean. Try out my technique...by doing the shave ahead of time with 2 baths (one after and one before the time) and then let him do oral, and see if he changes his mind.

If it hurts his neck he can sit on a rug/cushion on the floor, while your on the bed.

Or you can just convince him that having alittle bit of trimmed hair is nice so then you don't have to shave it constantly.

Hope this helps!!!

vaginas are seriously disgusting. I am the straightest man on the planet but i wouldnt eat any girls pussy no matter how many times she sucks on my dick

Just relax . I've had guys that loved it in the last and the one I have now doesn't . believe it or not just because society praises men for being a badass for loving eating pussy a lot of them just pretend to . Just ask him the truth twll him what you told us and let him say what he has to say and that'll be his ansser and hopefully you'll feel better about it then hopefully contemplate staying or living with it.

Talk it out with him.Get all these worries out in the open.Find out why. In the meantime you should look for the compatibilities between you and him.Think about why you are still with him.Is he the right guy for you.Can he do more to be a better boyfriend? Is he living up to his share of the relationship? It takes 2 people to make a relationship work.Its teamwork.Each person has their own responsibilities in a relationship.There is room for negotiating first.
Compromise with him.He gets what he wants if you get what you want.Also look for incompatibilities between you and him. There are 3 books you should read to learn what to do:



1)"Are You The One For Me?" By Barbara
De Angelis.

2)"Falling In Love For All The Right Reasons."
By Neil Clark Warren.

3)"Date Or Soul Mate?" By Neil Clark Warren.

These 4 books might be of interest too:

4)"The Little Book Of Red Flags". By Natasha Burton.

5)"Deal Breakers". By Dr.Bethany Marshall.

6):The Dirty Seven:Ladies Beware." By June Marshall.


7)"The Complete Idiots Guide To Handling A Break Up". By Rosanne Rosen.