A guy recently contacted me on a dating website. Boy did we kick it off! I was so excited. I'm 30/teacher and he's 30/Dr. We are both free evenings and weekends.
We are planning to meet on our first date today. I was excited and confident. He somehow mentioned it taking me 30 minutes. I said, "Uhm... actually it's 70 minutes" and he said, "Oh my. I didn't realize you were so far".
Now I'm absolutely devastated since in my mind I assume he's no longer interested but still going on the date to be nice. My confidence has plummeted. I thought he knew the distance!
Ugh.
My confidence has plummeted. Honestly, for me 70 minutes isn't too far. We could hang every. single. weekend. if anything but I'd be willing to make the drive more frequently and especially with all the holidays I have.
But i feel like i'm going to cry. I now feel so nervous going on this date.
Help me with advice! I'm about to go on a first date and about to cry because of this...?
2016-06-19 10:03 pm
回答 (6)
2016-06-19 11:35 pm
I read your post about going out with him and asking how soon u should ask him for marriage like 2 weeks ago. U should have gone on a date with him the previous saturday.mwhat happened? I hope u finally meet and will not ask him about his plans about marriage and i hope u will not screw up the date with being clingy, insecure and paranoid
2016-06-20 12:28 am
Hun, you're asking too many questions about this guy, you haven't met yet and you seem like a housewife worried that her husband is getting his pie else where. Don't talk about marriage, don't talk about in the long term, if he is worth it the distance won't put a barrier between you x
2016-06-20 1:10 pm
My advice is don't meet anyone from this site unless he is not only willing but EAGER to drive to your area and meet you. If a man isn't willing to drive to your area to meet you, he sure isn't going to be willing to make the drive for subsequent dates.
Stop getting so excited about men you haven't even met yet. Most of the men you meet on a dating site are going to be of the "throw him back" variety. Weed out the losers before wasting time on them by insisting that they come to your area.
It's not fair and maybe it's not polite to say so, but the power dynamics here are what they are. You are the girl. You have the good stuff that boys want. Women on a dating site get dozens of responses for every one response a man gets, so if a man doesn't like your "come to me" requirement, don't worry about it because there are others standing in line to take his place. Stop acting like these guys are you doing you a favor. It is you who are doing them the favor of agreeing to meet them.
Stop getting so excited about men you haven't even met yet. Most of the men you meet on a dating site are going to be of the "throw him back" variety. Weed out the losers before wasting time on them by insisting that they come to your area.
It's not fair and maybe it's not polite to say so, but the power dynamics here are what they are. You are the girl. You have the good stuff that boys want. Women on a dating site get dozens of responses for every one response a man gets, so if a man doesn't like your "come to me" requirement, don't worry about it because there are others standing in line to take his place. Stop acting like these guys are you doing you a favor. It is you who are doing them the favor of agreeing to meet them.
2016-06-20 2:33 am
Half of 70 is 35. Meet him half way.
I would not allow 40 minutes travel time to ruin what could be a good thing. Put it out of your mind so it does not bog things up.
I dated a guy who lived an hour away. We were worth giving the relationship a try because of our common interest in one another. A year later, he moved closer to me. We have been happily dating for years.
If he really likes you, and vice verse, distance will not matter. It won't.
I would not allow 40 minutes travel time to ruin what could be a good thing. Put it out of your mind so it does not bog things up.
I dated a guy who lived an hour away. We were worth giving the relationship a try because of our common interest in one another. A year later, he moved closer to me. We have been happily dating for years.
If he really likes you, and vice verse, distance will not matter. It won't.
2016-06-20 1:42 am
maybe you should move closer to him so its not an issue
2016-06-20 6:22 pm
Honestly, I would just break off the date. I wouldn't go out with a man that already has me feeling bad. There's plenty of other guys to choose from. Just say "NEXT!" and move on. Don't be so eager to make the drive and chase after him. A man should chase after you. Period. Break the date and then go on a date with someone else. Best wishes!
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