My mom thinks I'm ugly?
2016-05-20 5:19 pm
As a child I always overheard my mom saying negative things about my looks. She would say I have a big nose like my father & she feels bad that other people will bully me bc I wasn't pretty. When I was 6 I cried & told her that I wish I could die because I'm so ugly. SHE cried & told me that I wasn't ugly. After that she would tell me how nice I looked & that stopped eventually. From high school to now she compares me to my sister. She has said "Your sis has an exotic look, she can wake up & go but you need extra help" "We're going to be visiting family soon so we really need to give you a makeover" When she hears someone call me attractive she jumps in & says how my sister is actually the pretty one. I know I should be used to her insults bc she does this every single day randomly. We'll be talking about having dinner & she'll jump in w/an insult. but I'm not. She's the ONLY person who insults me but I guess her opinion matters the most to me, it makes me so uncomfortable when people find me attractive. My last bf was really cute & when she first met him she claimed that he must want something from me. Everytime I want to talk about it she acts dumb as if she's a nice person. I'm tired of her & the way she makes me feel. I want to cut ties w/her, Am I wrong to do that? Should I try another approach? Its really bad,
回答 (43)
2016-05-21 12:19 am
✔ 最佳答案
I am so sorry you have to go through this, no mother should ever call their child ugly, or even think it! This is abuse. If it were me, I would have one more talk with her, tell her how her behavior makes you feel, and make it clear that she cannot treat you this way any longer or else she will not be a part of your life anymore. Be firm and follow through with it if her behavior doesn't change. I'm assuming you are 18 or older - if you are a minor, unfortunately you'll either have to deal with her until you are able to support yourself and live on your own and cut ties with her then, or if it's bad enough, you may want to consider calling a child protection agency and reporting her.
I would also strongly recommend seeking counseling for yourself, as I'm sure this has had a huge impact on your self-esteem. Please know that no one has the right to abuse you like this, even your mother, and you deserve so much better! Your mother is the ugly one here, by far.
2016-05-20 11:16 pm
That's really mean. Nobody is ugly, you should tell her, God made everyone perfect and beautiful, we are all made in the image of God, so if she says you're ugly, then she is insulting the creation of God. You are beautiful no matter what.
Have you ever told her how you felt about it? You don't really need to get it across on an emotional level, just simply tell her "I really don't like it when you call me ugly, will you stop?"
And you said you feel uncomfortable when people call you beautiful, you shouldn't be. You are beautiful so thank people when they tell you that you're beautiful and believe it!
Hope all goes well.????
Have you ever told her how you felt about it? You don't really need to get it across on an emotional level, just simply tell her "I really don't like it when you call me ugly, will you stop?"
And you said you feel uncomfortable when people call you beautiful, you shouldn't be. You are beautiful so thank people when they tell you that you're beautiful and believe it!
Hope all goes well.????
2016-05-21 4:22 am
You need to comment on EVERY hurtful thing she says. Comments like "Wow! That was hurtful!", "How rude!", "I can't believe that any mother would stoop to telling her own child that!", "My! What a horrible thing to say to a person!" When someone makes a positive comment about your looks when your mom is around, before she can say anything, quickly interject with "That's so nice to hear! My mom always tells me I'm ugly!" Make sure your mom is right there when you say it to put her on the spot. And make sure you have specific examples lined up you can rattle off on the spot when she denies it. "Just yesterday when talking to xyz you said { }" 3 days ago you told me that I need a makeover, have to work hard to look good etc" And any other examples you can think of. You shouldn't have to do that more than once or twice before she shuts up.
2016-05-20 5:36 pm
Join the club, my mum has always said i have a big nose and it is the one thing on my body i hate, i have contemplated a nose job but shouldn't mothers be encouraging you to stay as you are because they love you unconditionally? My mum has said I'm fat and compared me to my sister, because my sister is a gym freak with tiny legs and abs. I cant offer you much help but I feel better knowing there is someone else out there who feels the same as i do and I hope that gives you somewhat hope that you are not alone x
2016-05-20 5:21 pm
Cut ties with her, thats so ****** up to call your daughter ugly, especially when she also claims her other one is prettier
2016-05-22 5:00 am
It's hard but sometimes the best thing for you emotionally is to cut certain people out of your life. Even if they're your parent. This is serious emotional abuse she's inflicted on you for a long time in your life. I think some good therapy will do good for you. Cutting her off won't be enough. You're still going to carry the things she said to you. It's natural. If you don't cut ties with her accept that she isn't going to change. Not saying that to be harsh but it's the truth. You can't change a person. Especially someone who isn't a very kind person. Good luck
2016-05-21 7:17 pm
Your mum most likely is insecure about herself. Besides, assuming she is speaking the truth, that you 'have a big nose', so what?Everyone has different features. Look at the people around you, are they models? No!
Be at peace with your appearance, and find your hidden talents that you can be proud of.
Be at peace with your appearance, and find your hidden talents that you can be proud of.
2016-05-20 5:49 pm
I think I would make a comment after she explained how ugly I am. Perhaps, "Yes, everyone says that it is so sad that I am a carbon copy of mom. Sis must have gotten her good looks from Dad's side of the family. It's heredity. What can you do?"
How about that for another approach? See how she likes it.
How about that for another approach? See how she likes it.
2016-05-20 5:43 pm
Good lord! Your mother has issues - probably a result from the way that she was raised. Just be true to yourself and forget about the negative comments and energy. This is YOUR life journey - make something of it on your own. Education and career is key. So focus and move forward!
2016-05-20 8:57 pm
The explanation to your mother's opinion is in your first sentence. You have your father's looks, so you remind her of the person who must have hurt her badly. Talk to her about it. It isn't your fault that your father hurt your mother. I am sure that you can come to a solution of this problem once your mother understands the reason behind her feelings.
2016-05-23 8:07 am
Next time she calls you ugly say, "Well you birthed me b*tch so that means you're ugly too." But seriously, if someone is making you feel down in life (and even if it is your mother) then maybe you should steer clear from her unless it's a holiday. Or at least try to sit her down and have a real conversation about how it makes you feel when she says mean things like that. Try that first and if that doesn't help then distance yourself from her. You don't need negative ppl in your life.. even if they are family.
2016-05-20 10:16 pm
Your mother must have found your father physically attractive to have had a relationship with him in the first place!!!!
Maybe he hurt her so deeply that she became bitter and found solace in "insulting" his looks! You are his child and obviously you remind her of him! She has no right to keep"putting you down" and insulting "your nose" to the point of damaging your self esteem and self confidence. This is " pure cruelty!"
I am interested to know if your sister has the same father as you?
I dont know how old you are, but i would definately seek counselling to get this off your chest! You dont have a problem, its your mother who is the twarped bitter woman with a cruel tongue who is bent on damaging your self esteem and confidence! If you are old enough, then I would recommend cutting all ties with her and moving out! So sorry that she is so horrid to you! You dont deserve that sort of ****!
Maybe he hurt her so deeply that she became bitter and found solace in "insulting" his looks! You are his child and obviously you remind her of him! She has no right to keep"putting you down" and insulting "your nose" to the point of damaging your self esteem and self confidence. This is " pure cruelty!"
I am interested to know if your sister has the same father as you?
I dont know how old you are, but i would definately seek counselling to get this off your chest! You dont have a problem, its your mother who is the twarped bitter woman with a cruel tongue who is bent on damaging your self esteem and confidence! If you are old enough, then I would recommend cutting all ties with her and moving out! So sorry that she is so horrid to you! You dont deserve that sort of ****!
2016-05-21 1:10 am
Ok you know what it's parents like this who need help and not there suicidial children. Here's what you need to do if anything tell your mom to SHUT THE **** UP and it doesn't matter how disrespectful it may seem because she says all this stuff about you and you bottle up your anger. Take out all your anger out on her and not on anybody else and it's a very rude thing that when ever someone says your attractive your mom jumps in and say your sister is more pretty it's like she wants her other daughter to be happy more than you if I was you I'd move in with a really close friend or family member but after you tell your mom to SHUT THE **** UP YOU IGNORANT *** ***** and then wait a little to apologize also if she snakes you I'm not saying you should do this all the time cuz it's not right to yell at your mother or hit her but smack her back don't kill her thoe
2016-05-23 1:06 am
Been there seen that with my mother. I pretty much cut her off and I moved on with my life. A mother should be supportive of her children not trying to take them down.
2016-05-22 10:00 pm
Have you ever confronted her about her comments ,that's really sad coming from your own mum.i wonder how she'd feel if her family started saying things to her I'd leave her alone for a while and let her know why.
2016-05-22 2:40 pm
Your mom sounds like a jealous ******* *****. I'd slap her to the ground...making a 6 yr old cry. Your mom needs an *** beating
2016-05-21 7:44 pm
Hey, my mom would do the same thing with me, except it involved my weight.
Honestly, tell her to stop and explain why she shouldn't do that. Or, when you are able to move out of the house and you can live on your own, cut ties with her immediately. Never take that from your parents.
I just straight up tell her that she is being rude and needs to stop. She usually does when I give her examples of how she is being awful to me.
EDIT: I forgot to mention that I am actually not fat or obese, I am average weight. My mom makes fun of my weight because she is naturally thinner than me.
Honestly, tell her to stop and explain why she shouldn't do that. Or, when you are able to move out of the house and you can live on your own, cut ties with her immediately. Never take that from your parents.
I just straight up tell her that she is being rude and needs to stop. She usually does when I give her examples of how she is being awful to me.
EDIT: I forgot to mention that I am actually not fat or obese, I am average weight. My mom makes fun of my weight because she is naturally thinner than me.
參考: I feel your pain
2016-05-21 1:29 pm
Just remind her of what hole u came from
2016-05-21 12:50 am
Just keep reminding yourself that the problem isn't yours, it is your mothers. Whether you are pretty or ugly is beside the point. Your mother clearly has serious personal issues to purposely belittle you, especially after you've spoken to her about it. And the reasons she does it could be anything from resentment of your father to some twisted jealousy of the attention paid to you by men who understand what REALLY makes a woman attractive. But her reason(s) DO NOT MATTER! No reason justifies damaging someone else's self-esteem to make you feel better about yourself.
Ignore her thoughtless comments, focus on your own happiness and above all, remember that this is HER problem, not yours.
Ignore her thoughtless comments, focus on your own happiness and above all, remember that this is HER problem, not yours.
2016-05-20 5:19 pm
she's so mean
2016-05-24 9:58 pm
Remind your mum about something called genes DNA, and if she thinks your ugly then she is partly to blame and she should go into her bathroom and have a good long stare at herself. She'll discover her stare will stare back at her and it wont be a pretty site. No offense meant to you, as you are entirely the innocent party at the butt end of your mum and dad's creation. Its the inside that matters, tell your mum that.
2016-05-22 11:34 pm
Im 100% sure you are very beautiful and attractive, even you know that ppl say that you are attractive, your mom is the one who should seek psychiatric help! She is so mean to say that to you.
Try to talk to your father or someone in the family.
Try to talk to your father or someone in the family.
2016-05-22 6:01 pm
That's messed up she is talking crap about u her daughter. This is complete bs ignore her stay out of the house do anything to stay away until she apologizes
2016-05-22 4:39 pm
Long ago I learnt to judge myself, allow NO one to box you in, dictate or life, and stop you from being YOU! Some people are not happy unless they are demeaning someone . Pray for her and go forward.
2016-05-21 9:07 pm
Stop putting up with this. I am a mother. She knows what she is doing. Stop her.
you only have one life. don't put up with this another day. This has turned into a
problem for you. turn it into a positive. Give her a word of advise. Stop it mom you
are hurting me. work it out w/ her. she will be glad you kept her around even if it is on your terms.
you only have one life. don't put up with this another day. This has turned into a
problem for you. turn it into a positive. Give her a word of advise. Stop it mom you
are hurting me. work it out w/ her. she will be glad you kept her around even if it is on your terms.
2016-05-21 4:00 pm
hey there, I am in the same situation. My mom would say that I am fat (not true), and that I get uglier everyday. She would say that Guys dont like me because of how I look. before, I was depressed and would cry for nights. but now, I've learn to have self-esteem. I would just laugh when my mom makes a comment. My friends used to say that my face is so flat , i have a big nose, and i have acne. I was hurt before but now, I laugh with them. Now, when I am in front of. a mirror, I will think myself as pretty, because it's your body and girl you are fabulous. Beauty is so subjective so i'm sure many people will find you hot:))
2016-05-21 6:51 am
Tell your mother how you feel about how she is towards you. She's giving you an unhealthy relationship and is not helping you with your confidence which mothers should do.
2016-05-21 3:26 am
Say these exact words next time she calls you ugly " guess I got my looks from you mom"
2016-05-21 2:18 am
Tell her that her constant negativity hurts you and when you become an adult, you are going to leave and not come back.
2016-05-22 8:21 am
2016-05-20 9:08 pm
You need to respond back angrily and perhaps abuaively. Give her a taste of her own medicine; ridicule and belittle her and tell her to let you know how it feels. When you are old enough cut all contact with her
2016-05-20 11:32 pm
You are trust her your mom knows what she's talking about!
2016-11-11 5:51 am
wow so why did she marry him yes i know some people marry for good personality
2016-10-12 4:12 am
Don't listen to your mother's childish, petty comments. She's being very horrible to you and it sounds like she's favoring your sister over you, also find a way to express your anger in a positive way such as art, sports, music etc.... or watch one of your favorite tv shows or read a book anything you enjoy doing. I'd also recomend moving in with a different family member like your dad or hang out at a friends house just so that you can avoid your mother as much as possible and don't be afraid to stand up for yourself if you have to ( this doesn't mean act disrespectful or rude but at least damand that she show you some respect).
參考: Good luck
2016-05-23 7:52 pm
I think outright you need to tell her to stop but only when you are an adult and financially stable then you would be able to talk to her less, probably not cut ties with her completely, but spend less time communicating with her, to avoid her criticisms.
2016-05-23 12:48 pm
If your mom or anyone makes you feel hurt or bad about yourself you should absolutely cut ties with them. You are only gonna keep suffering emotionally and mentally keeping people in your life that says things to bring you down. You should absolutely create some boundaries with your mom. I'm sure you love her so maybe cutting off all ties is a bit harsh. Perhaps just keep your distance. Don't talk to her and don't involve her in your life. Keep your distance as much as. Possible. But cutting off all ties with your mom may be going a little farther than you might want in the end
2016-05-23 5:44 am
you need to tell her the stuff she sys hurts you, also she is the one with the issue, she s your mom and she say s crap like that, your a gift of life, tell her and then move on, you don t need negative crap like that.
2016-05-22 6:24 pm
Your parents made you, especially your mother. So if you are ugly it's not your fault, its theirs.
2016-05-22 3:03 pm
I wonder why a mother says such things, finally you are a part of her and it is not your fault that your nose is big.
2016-05-22 8:55 am
Just focus on your good qualities or what makes you feel good. Not everyone is attractive but most people are attractive to someone. You can't change it either. It doesn't mean she doesn't love you.
2016-05-22 8:02 am
this is not right!! true parents feel like their kids are beautiful! its a mothers instinct! your mom is ridiculous and a horrible excuse for a parent! I feel sorry for you!!
2016-05-21 10:49 pm
You should get counciling with your mother she obviously has some deep resentment of you or something cause no mother should ever tell her daughter she's ugly and why would she favor your sister over you? My advice get ahold of Dr phil. Or some family cousiling if she wont do it then cut ties cause that's not fair to you and you should not have to put up with it. I'm sure your a beautiful woman and I feel sorry for your mother for not seeing the beauty in her own creation.
2016-05-21 12:40 am
it dose not matter what people thaink about how you look but it dose matter how you think you look.
2016-05-22 12:42 pm
D
2016-05-22 6:35 am
What?
2016-05-22 2:09 am
These comments but anyways, become white and shoot the entire family.
2016-05-21 8:03 pm
Punch her in the nose and then she will know how it feels to have a big nose when it's all swollen up
收錄日期: 2021-04-18 14:53:06
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