So if a person wrote on your driveway with chalk cusswords would you spank them if they pleaded you not to call the cops?

No. That's creepy.
However, I would totally spray them with the hose while washing it off my driveway.

If it was a girl and she was decent looking I would, otherwise I'd call the cops on them. I spank my wife all the time in bed. My wife screams at the top of her lungs and cries like a baby when I'm giving it to her in her asshole. I spit on her butt cheeks and smack her bare right butt cheek until there's a big red rash on it.