How to Tell My Sister "No"? (Advice please!)?
2016-04-28 1:15 am
So, my sister who has three children, has been asking me to babysit her kids for years now while she goes to work. At first, it was fine, I didn't mind, but over the years, she just seems to be taking me for granted. I have babysat for her for years, on all my days off, without any pay at all, and without thanks. She does not have any other babysitter, and she now expects me to babysit for her whenever she needs, at the drop of a hat. The only times she ever talks to me is to ask when I'm off to see when I'm available to babysit. I have gotten sick of it now, and I wish she would stop expecting me to babysit all the time. She is asking me now if I can babysit tomorrow, and it's my only day off, and I really don't want to. If I don't respond, she will drop the kids off to me anyway, and I can't tell her that I'm working, because we work at the same place, and she will notice. I can't tell her that I'm sick, because she will expect me to babysit anyway, and I don't want to tell her a plain "No" because I'm a pushover. Any advice? :(
回答 (21)
2016-04-28 1:40 am
omg. your sister is a jerk, seriously, even reading your question got on my nerves. my sisters would never ask anything of me because I am like younger, but are you older than her? i look up to my older siblings. and about your problem, if I were you I would just say, "stop taking me for granted. I'm your sister not your servant." and I think she is being pretty cheap by not buying an actual babysitter. a few months to a year is fine, but 3 years? the heck? that is just plain... wow.
but, it is kind of stubborn to not say no earlier, if you didn't enjoy it then why didn't you say no in the first place? well, okay here is how this conversation will play out when you talk to your sister next time. and you 2 work at the same place? she MUST know how hard it is then, seriously. here is how the conversation will play out if you take some of my advice.
sister: i'm dropping off my kids blah blah please babysit them i got work, can you babysit them?
you: no. i am your sister not your servant, i have a life and it is not babysitting your kids all the damn time because you are too (some reason [cheap]) to get a real babysitter.
sister: are you serious? please! i got 3 kids and you don't even have any!!
you: again, I got a life. i've been doing this for THREE YEARS, and you haven't even paid me! frankly, every damn time even if I say i'm busy you will drop them off anyways, THREE YEARS! I could've done so much, but you decide to take so much of my damn time and taking me for granted. At least a thank you would have been nice!
sister: omg blah blah blah
you: seriously blah blah
sister: okay fine blah blah i'll get a babysitter. sorry for using you for 3 years
sorry i went a little too into this lol, :) good luck! (tell this "sister" of yours I do not like her) (okay, no don't tell her that)
but, it is kind of stubborn to not say no earlier, if you didn't enjoy it then why didn't you say no in the first place? well, okay here is how this conversation will play out when you talk to your sister next time. and you 2 work at the same place? she MUST know how hard it is then, seriously. here is how the conversation will play out if you take some of my advice.
sister: i'm dropping off my kids blah blah please babysit them i got work, can you babysit them?
you: no. i am your sister not your servant, i have a life and it is not babysitting your kids all the damn time because you are too (some reason [cheap]) to get a real babysitter.
sister: are you serious? please! i got 3 kids and you don't even have any!!
you: again, I got a life. i've been doing this for THREE YEARS, and you haven't even paid me! frankly, every damn time even if I say i'm busy you will drop them off anyways, THREE YEARS! I could've done so much, but you decide to take so much of my damn time and taking me for granted. At least a thank you would have been nice!
sister: omg blah blah blah
you: seriously blah blah
sister: okay fine blah blah i'll get a babysitter. sorry for using you for 3 years
sorry i went a little too into this lol, :) good luck! (tell this "sister" of yours I do not like her) (okay, no don't tell her that)
2016-04-28 1:33 am
If you are going to be a pushover you get what you deserve. Its time to stand up for yourself and say no. When she asks why, tell her for personal reasons. When she argues, point out how she has taken you for granted for all this time and hasn't even offered a simple thank you in return. And when she does thank you (and she will), still refuse.
2016-04-28 1:21 am
if you don't want to respond then don't respond - just make sure that your out when she turns up with the kids, or you could try "sorry I cant as I have already made plans" you don't have to explain what the plans are, if she asks just say its private
2016-04-28 6:02 pm
If you don't want to say "no" you can tell her that you've already made other plans that aren't appropriate for children. If you do that a number of times in a row (5-6) she might get the hint. If she's dense and doesn't or becomes upset that you aren't doing your "sisterly duty" you might have to explain to her how you feel.
The best thing is to be straight up and honest with her, regardless how hard it will be. Tell her how you feel. When talking to her match how you present your case with how she normally interacts with people (if she's normally short and curt then you be the same, if she's friendly and polite then you be friendly and polite, etc.). Be firm in your position. If you enjoy watching them some times tell her that and that you don't want to never watch them again, just not every time you are off.
It could cause some friction- especially short term- but if ya'lls relationship is solid you'll withstand it.
Best of luck
Duke
The best thing is to be straight up and honest with her, regardless how hard it will be. Tell her how you feel. When talking to her match how you present your case with how she normally interacts with people (if she's normally short and curt then you be the same, if she's friendly and polite then you be friendly and polite, etc.). Be firm in your position. If you enjoy watching them some times tell her that and that you don't want to never watch them again, just not every time you are off.
It could cause some friction- especially short term- but if ya'lls relationship is solid you'll withstand it.
Best of luck
Duke
2016-04-28 3:39 am
say no
2016-04-28 1:20 am
You need to learn to say no. Just tell her no and how you feel. If you come across as too nice then she might guilt you into it.
2016-04-29 9:46 pm
S
2016-04-29 9:41 pm
First, NEVER let her know when you have a day off and make sure (if you do)...you have appointments all day long. Next, sit down with her and let her know how you feel and she needs to find someone else to baby sit for her
2016-04-29 1:58 pm
Explain to your sister that you are also a full time office worker and on top of that looking after three children is a strenous job . You need time to relax .If not due to stress and strain you will become very irritable which can ceate problems at work place as wel as at home . On top of that as a young girl you must mix up with your friends and enjoy life . Tell her to engage a babysiter and you could whenever possible help her .If the situation does not improve or if she does not respond tell her that you might decide to leave home and stay in a women's hostel.
2016-04-29 9:15 am
You can say a simple no and stand up for yourself or you can say no I'm busy and do you
2016-04-29 2:49 am
Punch her in the face
2016-04-29 2:21 am
Move to where she won't know.
2016-04-29 12:19 am
Just say you are going to be busy, or maybe don t tell her when you will be off from work. And if she takes the kids to your place anyway, don t be there. She will be stuck with the kids and you will have a kid free day. Also, if she gets mad at you and say you weren t home, just reiterate that you had plans and you weren t going to be home that day. Then tell her how you feel.
2016-04-28 6:50 pm
There comes a time, when enough is ENOUGH ! Tell her she needs to find another babysitter; You have things to do ! Straight-up, and honest is always the best way !
2016-04-28 9:06 am
Sit her down and have a good, long hearty talk with her. Does your husband babysit? Maybe you can make some arangments
2016-04-28 6:21 am
Tell her you have a date.
2016-04-28 5:15 am
Leave your house without responding. She'll have to take them somewhere else
2016-04-28 4:33 am
tell her she needs to pay you or youre not babysitting anymore, when she has to pay you she might stop asking you
2016-04-28 3:59 am
Just say no and immediately drop the subject.
2016-04-28 3:23 am
learn to aay no or start charging for your services.
2016-04-28 1:38 am
Tell her you have retired from babysitting and that, if she drops the kids off, you will call the police and report her for abandoning her children.
Leave early and stay away all day if you don't want to call the police. Tell the neighbors to watch for her and,if they see her leave the children, to call the cops. You can tell her that you warned her you would not babysit for her any more.
If you do not stand up to her you will find yourself babysitting her grandchildren too. Grow a backbone now!
Leave early and stay away all day if you don't want to call the police. Tell the neighbors to watch for her and,if they see her leave the children, to call the cops. You can tell her that you warned her you would not babysit for her any more.
If you do not stand up to her you will find yourself babysitting her grandchildren too. Grow a backbone now!
收錄日期: 2021-04-21 23:26:58
原文連結 [永久失效]:
https://hk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20160427171535AAjEHws