24 (female)
Been in an emotional abusive situation since day 1.
My father and mom has 4 children including me. However, during the time my mom got pregnant with me my dad was remarrying... But he was cheating on his new wife with his ex wife which was my mom. When I was born, I was ignored, and he told everyone I wasn't his child... So He went on and came and got my other 3 siblings every weekend and he had 3 children with his wife. One being the same age as me.when I turned 9. My dad felt guilty and started to bring me around his wife and kids.
I was treated like **** by my 3 whole siblings and my 3 half siblings. My siblings used to tell me that they came first, they told me that my dad only brought me around because of guilt, and my dad tried his best to love me and be nice... But most of the time he ignored me and avoided showing love to me because he knew it gutted his wife to see that.
I always thought I was supposed to come last to him. My mom try to lie and say I'm lying and that my dad loves me but Its me with the problem.
We are all adults now and my siblings still rub it in my face and tell me stories on things my dad said about me and how he regret me.
My father passed but there's nothing I can do to change it. I have low self esteem and get broken down everyday. If I defend myself ... Everyone attack me and make me the bad one.
How do I let go?
How to break free of past pain and cut off family?
2016-03-07 7:49 pm
回答 (3)
2016-03-07 7:53 pm
I would only talk to your mother on occasion but you need to save up and move far far away and start a new life. Your father will rot for making you feel like that and so will your siblings. If you don't need anything from them. I suggest walking away. Your family is the reason why you have low self-esteem.
2016-03-07 11:34 pm
maybe you should talk to a counselor about all this
2016-03-07 8:08 pm
You let it go and you let go.
Seems to me these people have your ear, and in order to do so, you need to leave them in their ignorance and not have to defend yourself or your heritage.
You were no where when decisions by family or parents were being made, since you cannot choose your relatives or who they are.
First and foremost: Read these words aka "The Serenity Prayer".
GOD GRANT ME THE SERENITY
TO ACCEPT THE THINGS,
I CANNOT CHANGE.
TO CHANGE THE THINGS I CAN.
AND THE WISDOM, TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE.
READ and Understand this as much as you can, until you can repeat it by heart, in your mind and spirit and then do exactly what it says.
Talk is cheap, and these people can say whatever they want.
I call it GARBAGE IN AND GARBAGE OUT.
You are doing yourself a dis-service, by listening to their garbage talk.
They are probably or most likely Jealous of you.
Cut yourself off TOTALLY, by not having anything to do with these people--
THAT IS UNTIL THEY HAVE CHANGED THEIR ATTITUDE and learned a lesson or two.
You in the meanwhile, need to FORGIVE THEM in YOUR HEART, since that is how you are going to achieve moving on SUCCESSFULLY from these TOXIC people.
Live yourself in your own way, and recognize friends, who are true and are peace loving and genuine.
Your low-self esteem is FED by these HATERS--who are obviously getting the better of you.
Some wise person once said--it is better to have one good friend than a thousand acquaintances.
One good friend, can bring you truth, peace, love, joy and happiness--but most of all, they accept you unconditionally without judgment and regardless of your flaws.
My faith points me to the love of God--who gave life to every human being, regardless of how they came upon the earth and loves every human who is here, due to God's grace.
God put us all here for a purpose and even if we don't have faith, we are worth God's love which is so different to human love.
God loves us unconditionally and even when we don't love him and acknowledge him.
Here is what God says,
Jeremiah 29V11:"For I know the Thoughts that I Think Toward you, saith the Lord, Thoughts of PEACE, and Not of Evil, to GIVE YOU (us both) AN EXPECTED END.
V12:"Then shall You Call Upon me, and Ye shall go and Pray unto me, and I will Hear you.
V13:"And You shall SEEK ME, AND FIND ME, when YOU shall SEARCH for me with ALL YOUR HEART.
V14:"And I will be FOUND of You, saith the LORD.."
Whenever I feel blue or am going through a problem, I read these words from scripture and get comfort.
In order to break free of past pain and cut off family, you have to find a source that will not let you down, and point fingers to you and lie to you.
All that these people say, must be REJECTED by you, since it is all a PACK of LIES.
God does love you, and even If you don't know God, God knows you and loves you.
God has never failed me, even when my mother and my father has failed me.
Peace and blessings to you and begin the first day of the rest of your life--one day at a time.
Seems to me these people have your ear, and in order to do so, you need to leave them in their ignorance and not have to defend yourself or your heritage.
You were no where when decisions by family or parents were being made, since you cannot choose your relatives or who they are.
First and foremost: Read these words aka "The Serenity Prayer".
GOD GRANT ME THE SERENITY
TO ACCEPT THE THINGS,
I CANNOT CHANGE.
TO CHANGE THE THINGS I CAN.
AND THE WISDOM, TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE.
READ and Understand this as much as you can, until you can repeat it by heart, in your mind and spirit and then do exactly what it says.
Talk is cheap, and these people can say whatever they want.
I call it GARBAGE IN AND GARBAGE OUT.
You are doing yourself a dis-service, by listening to their garbage talk.
They are probably or most likely Jealous of you.
Cut yourself off TOTALLY, by not having anything to do with these people--
THAT IS UNTIL THEY HAVE CHANGED THEIR ATTITUDE and learned a lesson or two.
You in the meanwhile, need to FORGIVE THEM in YOUR HEART, since that is how you are going to achieve moving on SUCCESSFULLY from these TOXIC people.
Live yourself in your own way, and recognize friends, who are true and are peace loving and genuine.
Your low-self esteem is FED by these HATERS--who are obviously getting the better of you.
Some wise person once said--it is better to have one good friend than a thousand acquaintances.
One good friend, can bring you truth, peace, love, joy and happiness--but most of all, they accept you unconditionally without judgment and regardless of your flaws.
My faith points me to the love of God--who gave life to every human being, regardless of how they came upon the earth and loves every human who is here, due to God's grace.
God put us all here for a purpose and even if we don't have faith, we are worth God's love which is so different to human love.
God loves us unconditionally and even when we don't love him and acknowledge him.
Here is what God says,
Jeremiah 29V11:"For I know the Thoughts that I Think Toward you, saith the Lord, Thoughts of PEACE, and Not of Evil, to GIVE YOU (us both) AN EXPECTED END.
V12:"Then shall You Call Upon me, and Ye shall go and Pray unto me, and I will Hear you.
V13:"And You shall SEEK ME, AND FIND ME, when YOU shall SEARCH for me with ALL YOUR HEART.
V14:"And I will be FOUND of You, saith the LORD.."
Whenever I feel blue or am going through a problem, I read these words from scripture and get comfort.
In order to break free of past pain and cut off family, you have to find a source that will not let you down, and point fingers to you and lie to you.
All that these people say, must be REJECTED by you, since it is all a PACK of LIES.
God does love you, and even If you don't know God, God knows you and loves you.
God has never failed me, even when my mother and my father has failed me.
Peace and blessings to you and begin the first day of the rest of your life--one day at a time.
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