How many times of cheating is enough? When do you walk out?
2016-01-09 2:58 pm
My husband and I have been married for almost 6 years. He's cheated before marriage and it's gotten worse since marriage. I keep forgiving and forgiving but I've reached my limit and I'm ready to sign the papers. So, what would you suggest? Keep fighting or walk away from it? Right now we are no longer living together and he's begging to come back home but I'm mentally drained
回答 (26)
2016-01-09 3:25 pm
✔ 最佳答案
Apparently you forgave far too quickly and did not do anything to repair the defect in your relationship which gave him the open door to infidelity.I suggest you get a book, "After The Affair" by Janis Abrahms Spring.
Inexpensive on Amazon.
This will tell you what you should have done the first time and give you much needed background information and knowledge about recovery from infidelity.
The biggest point though is that any recovery depends on the willingness of the unfaithful to change the ways.
That does not seem like an option now so best you stay away and read the book about forgiveness from the same author.
2016-01-09 3:20 pm
It's time to let him go now. He loves that you are his security but he also loves the thrill of cheating. Stop letting him have both. Once you let him go, you will feel alone and miss him but you will feel relieved. My parents were married for over 30 years and my Dad cheated on my Mom. When she separated from him that was the happiest that I ever saw her. Of course, he was very bitter towards her.
2016-01-10 5:06 am
One time should be enough to call it quits. Sorry, but cheating is not love. No matter how many times a guy claims to love you,yet cheat...that is not how love works
2016-01-09 3:51 pm
For myself 1 time is plenty the reality is if a person cheats once they are basically saying they have no respect for your feelings or you and that the whole aspect of devotion and commitment means nothing to them. That some cheap sex is more important than being faithful to your spouse why would anyone want to stay married to that.
2016-01-09 6:39 pm
how many times? ONE!!! if after the first time you both work it out, okay. But the 2nd time cheating would be MORE THEN ENOUGH for me to end it ASAP.
He knows you will take him back, so why does he have to worry. Grow a pair and MOVE ON with your life.
He knows you will take him back, so why does he have to worry. Grow a pair and MOVE ON with your life.
2016-01-09 6:33 pm
You KNOW it needs to end. Why are you needing
the approval of strangers to actually finish things?
the approval of strangers to actually finish things?
2016-01-09 6:10 pm
Lots of sexual infidelity? That's what you're talking about, yes? Not that he flirted with the gal at the grocery store but that he is simply not faithful, his core beliefs do not include fidelity and you have lived with two very different concepts of what is acceptable in a marriage for 6 years.
I'd personally consider it a marriage of false pretenses on his part and end it.
I'd personally consider it a marriage of false pretenses on his part and end it.
2016-01-10 6:06 am
My husband cheated before we moved in together and then three months after we moved in together for an entire year plus. Through the birth of our child and everything. After the truth was laid out I gave him one chance and only ONE he f--ucks that up he's gone. You need to know when to let go. If you say you're done mean it. He's playing games he's selfish and inconsiderate. My husband only cared about himself and his wants and needs. He and I still struggle marriage wise even in the sex department he never gives me sex enough and I feel like he's so desensitized to having sex with me because of all those times he cheated. I ever so much as suspected again I would be gone. Once you're forgiven by me the second time it's between you and God and I leave your sorry ***!
2016-01-09 6:17 pm
Get a part time job as a stripper and enjoy some attention yourself. Do not go back unless you like being number 2 and treated like it.
2016-01-09 3:03 pm
well once a cheater always a cheater, once a porn addict, always a porn addict if you get my meaning. men that are like this don't realize the emotional and spiritual toll this takes on any woman.
2016-01-09 3:44 pm
Ever think the fighting is what drives him to have the affair? Are you that combative that the only way he can prove to you that he's the man of the house is to cheat on you? Seriously woman, do you not understand how to take care of a man?
To answer your question, you walk out when you seriously are done trying to harass this man and make him the man you wish you married (but you knew you couldn't because you don't have what it takes to attract that kind of man - do you?). If you want to try something different, try not nagging him and pretending you two are separated already while living together; if things get better, then maybe it wasn't him all along, maybe it was you and your nagging and "my way or the highway" attitude.
To answer your question, you walk out when you seriously are done trying to harass this man and make him the man you wish you married (but you knew you couldn't because you don't have what it takes to attract that kind of man - do you?). If you want to try something different, try not nagging him and pretending you two are separated already while living together; if things get better, then maybe it wasn't him all along, maybe it was you and your nagging and "my way or the highway" attitude.
2016-01-11 11:48 pm
Go back home to your husband. You can also get yourself a boyfriend. be nice, life is too short to be with only one person.You both should have active sex lives outside of the home
2016-01-11 4:10 am
You have to decide what is best for you and your own life. I wish you well.
2016-01-11 1:13 am
Leave them as soon as they cheat. If you decide to stay and they do it again, I have no sympathy
2016-01-10 7:09 pm
One time is enough.
2016-01-10 6:16 am
Once.
2016-01-10 2:24 am
Only you will know when enough is enough for you. Nothing will change if it's tolerated.
2016-01-09 11:39 pm
A woman with a brain would not have married a cheater in the first place.
I have no idea with people without brains such as yourself do.
I have no idea with people without brains such as yourself do.
2016-01-09 8:38 pm
the fact that you have kept forgiving him is why he has continued to screw around.. boot him out now and divorce
2016-01-09 8:34 pm
One time is one time too many....
2016-01-09 5:25 pm
my wife would not give me any 2nd chance
2016-01-10 6:32 am
When your truely done, then you do not have to ask this question. I believe in prayer and I would take him to church and have him have a sit down with the pastor. Many many people have raised their spouses just like their children. They can grow to spiritual maturity and if your praying and worshiping together, God will bless you. No one is perfect and he is not a boy friend, he is your husband. I would walk forward in faith in Christ Jesus!
2016-01-09 10:42 pm
I suggest you stay married and go out and get some strange stuff yourself
2016-01-09 9:58 pm
Once a cheater always a cheater, although there are exceptions. If a one-time cheater is truly repentant, then there is a chance to restore the marriage, but, if one is a serial cheater (does it repeatedly), then there is no hope unless the non-cheating partner is willing to tolerate the cheating by her/his spouse. If s/he is not willing, then divorce is the only solution.
2016-01-10 1:15 am
How many times? 27.
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