My teacher is abusing me!!!?

Im in 5th grade and I was driving to school this morning down the boulevared when my teacher saw me...then she rear ended me. when i got to class she knew why I was late...because I had to wait for triple AAA and she said that I was to stay afterschool. Then she taped me to the floor and covered me in maple syrup, then feathers. Then her husband made her dinner on my back, then they smelled me...as I smelled like **** and said I needed a shower. They dumped this filthy water on me and made me walk home, with my hands taped together, stinking like ****, bird poop on my nose, covered in syrup and feathers. My husband went to her house and handcuffed them both and just left. then when we went to get a beer at the bar she came and we had a scuffle. Then she frced me to my house, locked me in my room and burned my tickle me elmo! What do I do? (please read my previous questions as youll se how mean she is)