Tell me a funny joke?

How do crabs get around?
They use the sidewalk.

So Helium walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve noble gasses in here." Helium doesn't react.

The Past,
Present,
and the Future
walked into a bar,
It was tense.

A skeleton walks in to a bar and asks for a beer and a mop.

Laugh, dammit!

rick takes a bike ride, he comes to a intersection and gets hit. when he wakes up, he is greeted by satan. satan leads him throu a dark tunnel with thousands of doors. behind each door is a differrent torcher method. each method scarier and more scarier then the other. satan opens the next door and rick looks inside and sees a guy on a couch getting ahead from a beautiful girl and drinking a beer. rick tells satan i'll take this one. satan looks at rick and says, are u sure! you'll be torcherd like this in a thousand year cycle! rick says oh yeah. satan says ok! he leads rick into his new torcher chamber and taps the girl on the shoulder and says, come with me i found your replacement.

How 'bout a really dumb joke:

What's brown & sticky? A STICK!!!!!!

So a guy walks into a bar..... and says "ow", because it was a metal bar. Get it? lol

Fish are never thirsty.