I feel like by ANYONE'S standards, not just mine, this is not okay. I love him, I trust him, but this situation is SO EFFING WEIRD.?

Before this we were WONDERFUL and healthy. M went to a music festival. We got in a phone fight and he was very upset. He was talking to this girl who helped mediate which was fine. Then she kissed him. He let her but didn't kiss back. Fine by me because he was honest about it, but I mentioned that in the future I would prefer if he didn't even let a girl kiss him to begin with. In a separate convo I had said that I wouldn't mind having another girl in the bedroom, if I MYSELF invited her there. He misunderstood I guess.
So M's good friend of 15yrs (who he has never had sexual relations with and never even wanted to), J, is visiting this week, Mon to Sat. I'm currently across the country visiting family, have been for a month and get back on Tues. I have never met J so it is HER intentions I am concerned with. Over the phone M casually mentioned that J has been sleeping in his bed with him this whole time. PLATONICALLY. And they snuggled PLATONICALLY and he was telling her how much he missed me and how he wished it was me in his bed instead. Cute right? **** no.
I am not okay with this at all. I was extremely upset. I had to make him apologize and promise me she'd sleep alone tonight. He honestly didn't think it was a big deal because of our prior conversation but is quite sorry for what he did. BUT, now I don't know what to think or feel. This really ****** with me and will continue to. Do I trust him? Do I break up with him or wait this out? WTF???