I've been dating my girlfriend for 4 years, and until recently our relationship has been near perfect. I could go on and talk about all of those things, but obviously that is not the problem here.
Over the past few months, this guy that she works with started to like her, and I initially told her to just tell him to stop bothering her and that would be fine. But she started hanging out with him behind my back(I am currently away at school) and they became close, though she says nothing even happened between the two of them, and I believe her. Eventually it came to blows when she told me that she was starting to have feelings for him and wasn't sure if she still wanted to be with me. We agreed to go on a break but I couldn't stand the thought of her being with him, and told her we needed to figure everything out. So after some arguing we decided to stay together. This was about a month ago.
Since then things have been extremely rocky. One minute we're okay and the next minute we are at each other's throats. It is like our relationship is permanently disfigured. I feel like she still wants to be with this guy, and I keep telling her to just be honest with me, but I don't know if she is. I feel like she resents our relationship, and it has made me very insecure. Also, I have been having a lot of second thoughts about staying with her. I just don't know if it is worth it anymore. Can someone give me a little advice about what to do?
Is my relationship worth saving?
2015-04-13 6:47 am
回答 (3)
2015-04-13 6:57 am
Sit down and talk this out. You're not there and you expect her to wait around until you are. Young people aren't going to do that. She's not a priority for you, school is. And that's okay. Get it out of the way. So maybe you should break up and explore other things and people. Who knows you may find each other again after you finish school. If you love her, set her free.
2015-04-13 6:55 am
Okay, you have three different ways to go from here.
One, stop trying to get angry and the moment a fight seems imminent, back off a bit and don't keep pressing the issue. If she starts to drift further away, you might want to duck out
Two, just ask her straight up about the guy himself. Don't be angry or anything about it, and just ask it like it were any other question. Pay attention to her body language as she responds, as it could tell you more than you think you know. If she gets angry at you for asking, she is obviously afraid of answering, in which case she has feelings for the guy and might not want to be with you.
Three, win her back. Prove that the other guy isn't worth her time by showing her just how amazing you can be. Take her out a little more. If she still resents you after that, it might be over.
Of course, you can just continue arguing and such with her, which will ultimately get you nowhere
One, stop trying to get angry and the moment a fight seems imminent, back off a bit and don't keep pressing the issue. If she starts to drift further away, you might want to duck out
Two, just ask her straight up about the guy himself. Don't be angry or anything about it, and just ask it like it were any other question. Pay attention to her body language as she responds, as it could tell you more than you think you know. If she gets angry at you for asking, she is obviously afraid of answering, in which case she has feelings for the guy and might not want to be with you.
Three, win her back. Prove that the other guy isn't worth her time by showing her just how amazing you can be. Take her out a little more. If she still resents you after that, it might be over.
Of course, you can just continue arguing and such with her, which will ultimately get you nowhere
2015-04-13 6:53 am
Break up with her. Because emotionally she's already gone. and you're trying to save something which doesn't exist anymore.
收錄日期: 2021-04-21 01:38:14
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