just a relationship rant?

It's nice to be in a relationship when it works smoothly, but the time ALWAYS comes when it's time to WORK "at" the relationship. People are Personalities that change as time goes on. People are NOT an ITEM you purchase and will stay the same FOREVER. Commitment isn't a WORD, it's WORK. Focused Work to your mate, BUT not only your mate, YOU NEED TIME for yourselves so you don't suffocate each other. NOBODY wants to be in a relationship so they stop growing and living. In your 20's a new world opens up. In your 30's you start to establish yourself. In your 40's, and up you settle in and enjoy what ever you have accomplish "Alone" or "With Someone". The term, life partner isn't found in just one or a few relationships. It's a collection of what you have experienced in ALL RELATIONSHIPS. Family, Friends, Love, Casual and Business. ALL RELATIONSHIPS, so that "Till Death Do You Part" DOES NOT end in Divorce. If you ever get a brand new car… time yourself to see how long/short it takes for it to become "No Big Deal." to YOU. Most people learn about VALUE, after REGRET.

In the "Dating Stage" is when you're suppose to find out if you are compatible. Even if things change down the road between you and you don't workout as a couple, you should have had the times (memories) that make you feel like you didn't waste your time with the wrong partner.

A Relationship with some one is like an introduction to marriage. You learn and find out "What it would be like, to be 'til death do you part' with this person". Communication is vital. If you can't "talk to" -OR- "with" your mate or are AFRAID too, you don't have a RELATIONSHIP. You have a Companion by your side. If you are not 50/50 with each other, one of you has a "Support System". With good communication established, neither Mate should Never Ever ask the World (Yahoo Answers) or ANYONE something about your Mate, that you can't ask THEM. If there is an issue between you two, no one can sense the emotion or thoughts of the issue or between/with you two. If you are in a Relationship and want it to run smooth you need to establish 50/50 boundaries. 50/50 is an understanding of equal responsibility so that NO ONE MATE feels the pressure always bearing the responsibility. 50/50 is taking turns paying, cooking, cleaning and involvement in being responsible (equally). This includes entertainment w/ expenses, sex and boredom.
If you force yourself to be comfortable or tolerate the way you two are with each other for FEAR of being alone or not ever finding anyone again. You are NOT GOING TO MAKE IT and all your Fears will happen anyway, after you have lost time, money and patience with your "Wrong Mate". NOBODY gets into a relationship so their mate can control them and force restrictions.
That is what Dogs and Puppets are for.
Respect, Trust, Honesty, Communication, Understanding, Cooperation, Responsibility 50/50
The only difference between breaking up in a Relationship and ending A Marriage in Divorce is the $$$$$ spent to get the Marriage license and the $$$$$ spent to get rid of it. Plus the embarrassment of a Failed Relationship.

Even in a FRIENDSHIP Relationship. One of the BIGGEST mistakes people make with each other (not only couples) is not establishing communication and understanding. Usually one of the two doesn't want to make waves, so when there is confusion or a misunderstanding "a raging sea and massive hurricanes" take place between them and sometimes ends them both.
You need to learn to talk and establish the ground rules for possibilities (like rumors, cheating, mistakes, misunderstandings, mood swings, personal space and privacy) if you don't, you will always bump heads when these unexpected things show up.
YOU are NEVER suppose to accommodate people, you don't know very well. You are suppose to let "them" get to know who and how you are. They can decide if they want to be around you. Being a puppet, you might make people like you, but you have to keep being different every time you want to please everyone.
NO BODY RESPECTS A PUPPET, because they (people) don't know how FAKE you will be next time or at different times.
IF You have something to say or ask… do it. You won't happy "babysitting" people in your age group anyway.

TRUE FRIENDS talk about things like this. Reliability, Respect, Considerations, Communication. ESPECIALLY what is Acceptable and what IS NOT.


Plus being a Walking Encyclopedia of Insecurities of based on others, is no life to live.

If you're in a Wrong Relationship… break up and keep dating to find someone better.
If you're a Bad Marriage, cut your losses and Divorce before your years disappear and all you have left are REGRETS. People always make MISTAKES of all KINDS, but thats how you learn RIGHT from WRONG, GOOD from BAD. It's called EXPERIENCE

i would dump him if you feel that way