If you have some aspects in your birth chart but theyre in a wide orb...?

The tighter the orb the stronger the energy. However sometimes there are issues in your life that can be explained by an aspect that isn't the standard 10 degree orb especially when the sun and moon are involved in that aspect.

I have a friend (ha ha) that has an opposition (hard aspect regarding relationships) with an 11 degree orb between Sun and Jupiter. This often gave a 'know-it-all' air to this person especially in relationships because nobody wants to be with someone all the time that thinks they are your 'teacher' as we all have things to contribute to a relationship. We should 'learn' from each other.

Realizing that this Sun/Jupiter opposition was a turn-off for others, especially when a closer relationship was desired, learning to not 'know everything' changed their nature for the better. Just an example how wider orbs can be important at times.

And have you ever looked at a natal chart that only uses tiny orbs of 3 degrees? There are so few aspects that more information is wanted! Orbs are not etched in stone. Whatever floats your boat.

This is just an example of how 'rigid' orbs can sometimes overlook something staring us straight in the face. And we never really know how much one has evolved so one could have overcome a hard aspect with a tight orb while still working on the aspect with a 'wider-than-usual' orb.

Most astrologers are quite rigid regarding orbs but I tend to bend the rules at times. That is just my nature as an Aquarius desiring to 'rebel' against the 'rules.'

And our personality is ruled by our Rising Sign, or Ascendant, which is the cusp of our 1st House. The sign on the 1st House and any planets within the 1st House contribute to not only our personality but our personal appearance and our first impression we make when meeting someone new.

So if you are looking for your personality head to the 1st House. Our personality is our 'getting around town' face as we do our errands and deal with other people that we really don't know. Once we have known someone a bit longer we begin to know their nature better ( their sun) and eventually their emotions (their moon).

Hope this is helpful to you and good luck and bless you too.

yes.

The first thing I would think about is a scorpio or pluto aspect... most likely pluto conjunction. But, in all fairness I think it would make more sense to look at both your charts and see if there are any synastric aspects that could indicate an obsession over that certain past lover. For example your pluto conjunct their sun. Or even mars in the other person's 12th... things like that. Of course, obsession is different from lovesickness. You can easily be heavily lovesick over an ex you loved very much and think of them every time, every second... doesn't mean you're obsessed - I would say that is natural.