Things I don't get...?

You ask much Iam!

Believe it or not astrology is always just one person's opinion. This is how I look at a chart and hope this gets you going a little bit better.

The most important things are your Sun, Moon, Rising Sign.

The Sun=Our Nature (Aries has a fiery aggressive nature, the 'warrior')
The Moon=Our Emotion (Scorpio Moon has secretive, deep, and strong emotions)
Mercury=Our Communication (Aries Mercury is not afraid to speak out and understands quickly)
Venus=Love (Gemini Venus are flirtatious, spontaneous, and shouldn't settle down young because they can often be players)
Mars=How We Fight/Sexual Desire (Aries Mars is VERY strong, loves conquest, and goes where angels fear to tread)

Your Sense of Humor probably comes from your Gemini Venus as I imagine when you are 'flirting' it tends to strengthen. Also Aries Mercury is 'quick on their feet' with their sarcastic wit too.

And your Moon in Scorpio Emotions are what is inside your heart, not something that you 'show' everyone. Our Moon is how we 'feel' and we don't share this to all.

And your Rising Sign is your personality, personal appearance, and first impression made. So when you first meet someone you might be rather quiet until you feel comfortable and then Virgo Rising can take off from there and you can actually be quite talkative.

Hope this helps get you started and here is a little blog I started for Beginners in Astrology. Good luck and bless you too.

http://amethyst33astrology.wordpress.com/

Each planet represents a facet of your personality ... an inner need.
Moon is your automatic emotional responses and your need to feel emotionally safe. In Scorpio, your emotional responses are very intense, very extreme ... so to feel safe you tend to keep a lid on them .. you try to control them and keep them contained. You might be so successful that even YOU don't see your emotions.

The Rising sign is not a planet.
Therefore it is not a facet of your personality, not an inner need. The Rising sign is your "social mask" that you put on when you enter a room of strangers. You don't let everyone see the real you .. we all keep some or most of ourselves "hidden" in front of strangers, and we have this "mask" that we allow them to see.
Yes, people will see you as a Virgo ... low-key but very talkative. The more nervous you are, the more you talk, and the more you talk .. in great detail about whatever it is you are talking about. Either that, or when you are nervous you find something that needs to be done, something that needs to be fixed, and you occupy yourself with "making it right" (and therefore don't have to deal with your nervousness at all).

How can you have Scorpio emotions and think/speak like an Aries? The conscious mind (thoughts) is separate from the unconscious mind (emotions). We are complex people, we humans, and there are many things that work well together, and many things that contradict each other inside of us.
Your Aries mind is quick and sharp, like static electricity in the air ... your emotions are very heavy and intense. Start watching inner self as you respond to life ... that will connect you with your Moon-Scorpio.

It is the "aspects", those certain particular distances that might occur between any two planets, that tell you which needs support each other and which contradict each other.

Without the actual degree of the sign that the the planets are in, no one can tell you what aspects they might make to each other.
15 Aries is sextile (compatible/supportive) with 15 Gemini.
But 2 Aries is square (disruptive/conflicting) with 29 Gemini.
So no, can't tell you is your Aries-Gemini placements "blend" well.

As for humor ... well everyone has a sense of humor ... unless they have a very strong Saturn in negative aspect with their inner planets. Even these people, however, can have a very wry sense of humor.

I have found through years of studying astrology, that individual planets don't have a huge impact on your personality. It's the entire chart that says things about who you are. The shape of your chart is important.

We have nothing in common, we have different placements but why is it that I understand what you're asking??? someone explain this to me.

First thing to understand is that others have their charts as well.

There're 3 factors to take heed

Your chart
Current transits
Their chart

Everything plays the role

You can't look at planets being simply your "actions" because both of your actions and reactions are there based upon your wish and will. So each planet acts and reacts based upon the above-mentioned factors.
The Moon isn't just a switch with "On-Off", it's far more complex.

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Now, when you think about it you are on a good road to learn, but the sooner you realize that you're all signs (in different areas) - the better. Take it holistically.

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Houses are more important regarding "you" and the planets are there to intensify or decrease the influence of something. Basically, you have to connect the houses with the planets.

Humor is a manifestation of intellect and spirit, so it's a combination of Gemini and Sagittarius. So you look at 3rd house as well as 9th. If your 3rd house is in the Sagittarius you have to search for the placement of Jupiter. If Jupiter is in the Taurus (example) you might like "down-to-earth" jokes or you will look at money as " a joke" or something to have "Fun with", basically. If it is in the Scorpio, you will like tad darker jokes which will be intensified by others suffering.
However, planets in one particular sign also play the role of the humor. If you have more in Aries you'll like the jokes regarding the army etc. If it's more in the Gemini you'll like the jokes about friends, schools etc. If it's in the cancer you'll tend to like family oriented intern jokes more.