可否幫幫忙看看這篇短文那裡需要修改呀? 謝謝

As an re-entry applicant, the process of application gives off a completely different feeling from the first. This time, I am no longer overwhelmed by the nervousness or excitement I had when applying to different universities. Instead, in its place were memories of the campus life I once had while attending this university. (1) The seemingly endless hours of studying at the library, the interaction amongst my fellow classmates, and the spirit of teamwork that I had learned through group projects were some of the most precious moments I had gained. The tender and caring environment that I encountered at the university motivated me to become a volunteer in Macao. (2) The values of teamwork that I had learned at the university became one of my greatest assets for working in the society.

Since I left the university in 2011, I have found two different jobs in the gambling industry. However, during the entire process of working, my friends and colleagues frequently asked me the same question: "you were so close to graduating, why did you choose to drop out and get a job instead?" Indeed, I was very close to getting my dploma. However, due to financial difficulties within my family, I had no choice but no withdraw from the university. The decision to discontinue my education was a difficult one to make because it would mean that one of the most important things in my life would be left uncompleted. Life is full of regrets, I told my myself at that time. However, after indulging myself in work, I came to realize that important things in life should not be easily given up on. Therefore this time, if I am re-admitted to the university, I will try my best to achieve my academic targets.

2013-01-19 12:40:22 補充：
(1) Might want to switch "this university" with the name of the place you're applying to.
(2) maybe include why it motivated you to become a volunteer... to pass on that feeling of warmth you gained at the university? ...maybe

As a reentry applicant, my feeling towards the application this time is completely different from the first time. Tiny little memories in the past, like how much time I had spent in libraries, the unforgettable experiences on campus, and the interaction between classmates of different nationalities. The spirit of team work that I had learnt through presentation projects is the most precious experience for me to use effectively in my job since I have stepped into the society. The delivery of tender solicitude from the university influenced me to become a volunteer in Macao during spare time . Since the drop out of university in 2011, I have found two different kinds of jobs related to the gambling industry which has been the livelihood of Macau. "Why haven't you graduated before getting into the career life?" was a question that have been asked by my colleagues and friends all the time. Indeed I was so close to get the diploma; However, something terrible happened and due to the financial issue of my family, the only thing I could do was to quit the university first. The decision of my temporary drop out of university was really difficult to make because it was one of the most important things yet to be finished in my life. Life was full of regrets. However, I realized I was not supposed to give up chasing the unfinished regret easily. Therefore, I will try as best as I can to make up my academic target this time.