誰可以看懂我自己作的totolly rubbish?THXX

tze

2011-09-02 3:44 am

my home live a frog,so cute is it when it look at me,it likes eating insects and always jumping on the road.moreover,it is very brave.one day,when it watches a snake coming and dont escape,it goes to battle with the snake and then swallowing it,this time i wonder how can a frog eat a snake. it is bizzare food chain twist.
and the tyhoon is coming above the ravine ,the water wake many things up and also it(頂真有沒有分加^^),it swam on the water and have no effect by the tyhoon,eventually it is safe and move it home to southern.

in the next year it came back to my home and find girl friend,but unsuccessful because of it's face is not too handsome
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誰可以看懂我自己作的totolly rubbish?THXX
20marks!!!!!!!!!

更新1:

改文法!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THXXXXXXXXXXXX

回答 (1)

[匿名]

2011-09-11 12:09 am

✔ 最佳答案

我是一位中學英文教師（信不信由你）。你的作文有很多錯處，但還是看得明白的！讓我幫你改一改吧。
my home live a frog,it is so cute when it look at me.It likes eating insects and always jumps on the road.However,it is very brave.One day,when it watches a snake coming and it dont escape,it goes to battle with the snake and then swallowing it,at this time i wonder how can a frog eat a snake. it is bizzare food chain twist.
and the tyhoon is coming above the ravine ,the water wake many things up and also it,it swam on the water and have no effect by the tyhoon,eventually it is safe and move it home to southern.

In the next year it came back to my home and find a girl friend,but unsuccessful because of it's face is not too handsome.
改好了，希望幫得上你，小朋友！

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