英文作文狠評

2011-08-07 12:23 am
Learning English through popular cultureYou have just started a new blog page. You want your blog to be about your favorite singers Write your first blog post describing some of your favorite stars and what you like about them. (250 words or above) I’m so happy that you’re watching my blog .It’s my first blog post, today I’m going to write about my favorite singer ‘lady gaga’ When someone’s talking about lady gaga, always talks about her dress and style, even her behavior. Because she is a famous, outstanding, talent and brave girl, it is the reason why she is my favorite signer. She was not luck about her career, she had released an album before she named ‘lady gaga’ which didn’t popular at all, the cover of album she was a pure girl who had a black hair and eyes, wore a white t-shit and blue jeans. Her dress is very common in USA . But about two years later, she had a great change and restarted her career, she were release an album ‘The Fame’, which has been very popular until now. This time she wore glasses with diamond cover, hold something similar microphone about her mouth. And changed her style to pop song which similar 80s style. Her first released song ‘just dance’ made her became a famous singer, this is the first time I have listened to her, presently I found that she is charming and talent at music, then I searched more about lady gaga on the internet, also found she is trendy and mad about fashion. The most impressive about her is an award ceremony, she clad a real beef dress and walked into red carpet while everyone’s eyes were caught by her. After that, someone talked about her dress is nervous and she is a freak, but she neither got upset nor angry about that, even still keeps going to her style and fight for gay’s right. Through that, I though I’m crazy about her. She is different to another singer, her strive, fearless, trendy made me became one of her 'monster'.
更新1:

:( 可5可以打埋分比我 thz~ and 有乜野要改善 thzz~~

更新2:

我9月升f.5

回答 (2)

2011-08-07 8:16 pm
✔ 最佳答案
I’m glad that you’re reading my blog .This is my first post. Today I’m going to write about my favorite singer --‘lady gaga’ When someone talks about lady gaga, they always mention her dress and her style, even her behavior. Because she is famous, outstanding, talented and brave. That's the reason she is my favorite signer. Her career path was not fortunate. She released an album before she was named ‘lady gaga’ which wasn't popular at all. The cover of album was purely a girl with black hair and black eyes; wearing white t-shit and blue jeans. Her dress code was very common in USA . About two years later, she had a great change and restarted her career. She released an album naming ‘The Fame’, which made her very popular. On the cover this time, she wears glasses with diamond cover, holding something like a microphone with her mouth. And changed her music style to pop song which is similar to the 80s' style. Her first song released ‘just dance’ famed her. That was the first time I listen to her songs. I found that she is charming and talented. When I was searching more about lady gaga in the internet, I also found that she is trendy and crazy about fashion. The most impressive about her was the award ceremony, she clad a real beef dress and walked on the red carpet while everyone’s eyes were caught by her. After the ceremony, someone described her dress as nervous and saying that she is a freak. She neither got upset nor angry about that, she even keeps going with her style and fight for gay right. I’m crazy about her. She is different from another singers, her strive, fearless, trendiness made me became one of her 'monster'.

2011-08-07 12:17:36 補充:
That's the corrected version, sorry I did not bold the corrected words

2011-08-08 09:53:15 補充:
幾多分要睇你E+ form 幾,你錯ge多數係past tense 同present tense 好亂,同埋有d位好慮聚

2011-08-10 19:03:22 補充:
如果你係英中ge話,對唔住講句,lei 份可以只係勉強合格,睇係睇得明,但係grammar 錯得幾多下,如果出到去DSE,我諗都會有2-3 ge
2011-08-07 8:57 pm
你呢篇英文合乎到題目要求,,而且睇得明,,,但有grammar上既錯誤,,而且有d應用多d連接詞,,但用呢呢篇同題目來講,,係舊制會考一定會有合格


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