grammae correct,vocab improv

It is difficult for people to accept a student who is late all the time. If you are the boss, who would you give the offer to? The person who is always late to school or the one who is never late? Of course, you would choose the latter. Your lifestyle can be changed but your school record cannot be altered. At that moment, the only thing that you can do is to accept the fact. Would you like to have a result like that? If you don't, it's time to change! But the problem is: how to change? Most students are attracted to play computer games. Lots of time is consumed on those computer games, but they did not plan to spend so much time on them. From the view of the professionals, the only thing that we should do is to lock the computer or the PS3. This is because they cannot control themselves. Solving this problem by external force is the best and only solution. Last but not least, our Student Association members are all willing to help you. You may visit our official website at www.aschool.edu.hk/HAHAHA, and communicate with us through this electronic medium during night time. I firmly believe that with the concerted endeavour of our school and Student Association, the students’ lateness problem can be put to a halt in the near future. Thank you.

A few comments: This is a piece of public speech, right? However, a number of sentences are quite wordy (not concise enough), making it difficult for the listeners to understand if they don't have your script. If the sentences can be shortened without changing its meaning, shorten them to make the speech more natural. I have changed to use some short form of tenses to make your speech sound more conversational. Remember it is a speech, not an essay. Keeping it concise and avoid wordiness is key to listeners' understanding.