請幫忙修改cover letter.

Hi,

As a covering letter yours is too long. You are rewriting all your CV in this covering letter. One tips, you should emphasize the information useful to your application, not ALL the info of your life. Each application should have its own covering letter, if you want to impress your examiner. It is not a good habit to use one model covering letter for all the applications.

Good Luck!
-----------------------------------

In response to the advertisement in the South China Morning Post of last Saturday, I would like to apply for this post.

I am twenty-four years old. I was educated in XXX Secondary School where I passed the Hong Kong Certificate of Education Examination in 2003 with English Language, Chinese Language and Commerce. I have completed the Yi Jin Project for Certificate in Wedding Planner at XXX School. I was the third Outstanding Student of the year and I got grade A in 7 courses including English I and II, Chinese and Mathematics in Practice.

As you will see from my curriculum vitae , I have worked as an Assistant Merchandiser in garment field for 3.5 years at XXX Limited after my eduaction in Hong Kong College of Technology. My responsibilities include assisting supervisor to follow sample and bulk orders, dealing with overseas customers and manufacturers through internet, data entry and filing.

These experiences and the education I received have prepared me to take on more responsibilities in further. As XXX Company has a fine reputation in aviation industry, I would like to work for it. I am able to work under pressure and I enjoy working with a team. I have confidence that I have sufficient ability to fulfill the requirement for the position.

I enclose my curriculum vitae for your consideration and look forward to be granted an interview where I can explain more in detail my abilities.

Yours faithfully
XXX

Encl.

我公司是推廣健康新文化目標是將健康這個使命推廣出去~近日公司擴充業務,需要大量熱心認真的推廣員~兼職一星期二,三晚有二,三千元另外full time可到8000以上~如果你認為健康業有發展空間我誠意邀請你來了解請登入這個網址,會有專人連絡.http://www.lossweight-now.com/join.html(大專及大學人士優先)