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What should parents do when children fight among themselves

Fighting among children is a real challenge for parents. Hereunder are three things parents are advised to do when it occurs. We suggest parents to follow the first in all situations, and resort to the second and the third when it does not work.
1. Accepting：


Bickering or fighting is one of the ways children learn to deal with problems in life. They usually stop doing it when parents show no response to their behaviour as they learn that what they are doing is not drawing any attention. In the process, they can learn to explore more constructive alternatives to solve their problems. Do not forget to encourage them when they show the ability to dissolve a fighting situation. You may tell them "I am glad to see you're so nice to each other," or "I see you've got things right very well".

2. Staying away

Avoid playing the role as an onlooker to the fighting. If you find the fighting annoying, you may go to the bedroom or bathroom when they fight, then return to the scene quietly when it is over. But do remember to hold back your criticisms and avoid making counterproductive comments like "Can you see now! What's the fuss all about?".

3. Ring-fencing


You may tell the fighting children to go outisde the house. Pay attention to what and how you speak when you make this request. It should go in order like this:

（１）Tell them in a calm and firm tone, "if you keep on fighting, you must go ouside. Come back in when you are finished." Say it once and do not repeat.


（２）If they do not want to go outisde but keep on fighting, take them outside the house. Remember to do it decisively but without showing them you are angry.


（３）When you find yourself in a situation where you need to follow this advice, remember that silence is the key to make it work. Avoid saying unnecessary things.

2010-03-11 11:32:45 補充：
Fighting is unpleasant. When children fight, put them in a place where they cannot disturb others. Follow the above advice, and you will find the fighting over without you noticing it.

2010-03-11 11:32:56 補充：
Only in situations where dangerous or sharp objects are involved in a fight that parental intervention is necessary. In such cases, an angry and over-reacting parents will not help. You may just take away the dangerous objects from their hands quietly to make them understand it is not right.

2010-03-11 11:33:01 補充：
Talk to them about their dangerous behavour after a while or on the next day. An unemontional and sincere discussion will help them undestand their mistakes and change their behaviour.

(dispute主要用於國際間 / 法津上 / 權益上的紛爭, 用在孩子的拌嘴不適合. fighting 不單是動手打架, 也是吵嘴)

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How to deal with disputes between children

The emergence of disputes between a child does make many parents feel helpless to deal with a quarrel between a child there are three methods, suggesting that parents should first adopt the first method, if no effect, and then use the second or third.

1. To accept it:
Children or the children, they need to learn how to cope with life Cuo title, so bicker or quarrel is that they learn to solve the problem one way.Parents only need to remain silent, let the children to deal with. When the parents do not say anything, sooner or later they will stop, and let them know that this is unable to obtain parental attention, and they must learn to look for another more constructive solution.When they successfully processed after an argument, do not forget the appropriate incentives, such as: "I am so glad to see you brothers and sisters love each other!" "I see you effectively deal with this problem!" And other similar words.

2. Far from it:
Do not think that the kids are arguing, "the audience", if you see or hear one of their quarrel easily upset or angry, to the bedroom or bathroom to go until the end of the quarrel, and then quietly returned. Remember! Do not preach or criticism: "Read! Do not quarrel of the Well!" This kind of superfluous words but to come to naught.

2010-03-09 20:29:11 補充：
3. Isolate it:
Asked quarrel children to go outside, but that special attention to their own attitudes and words, follow these steps to carry out.

2010-03-09 20:29:21 補充：
(1) tell them (pay attention to his tone of voice and tone is calm): "If you want to continue to be noisy, you have to go outside. When you come back after the end." Just say again, do not repeat.

2010-03-09 20:29:26 補充：
(2) If they are unwilling to go outside, but still noisy, non-anger Strip them to go outside, remember that attitude must be determined.

(3) If you want to use the third method, repeatedly emphasized that "complete silence" importance.

2010-03-09 20:29:54 補充：
No one likes an argument, if the child would like to be noisy, provide them with a do not disturb other people's sites. When you use the method above recommendations, the quarrel will soon end, the storm quickly disappear.

2010-03-09 20:30:30 補充：
In addition, unless the child to heavy or sharp weapon to hurt each other, parents need to be party to intervene, without surprise or anger, then just calmly take the child in the hands of heavy or sharp object, no speak, the children would know that this is wrong ,

2010-03-09 20:30:33 補充：
Etc. After a while, or obtain other children the next day to discuss the matter, I believe that in an atmosphere of calm, the child will be sincere to know their own fault, but gradually change their behavior.