How do I communicate to my fiance that his viewing porn hurts me?

There are a lot of good reasons to not look at porn but I don't think this is a good one. Clearly the problem is with you here. You say you used to look at porn as well so the only problem I can see you having with your fiancé is that he watches other people have sex and it turns him on (I'm assuming).

You have to realise that porn is a fantasy, it's not the way real people have sex and I'll bet that your fiancé probably wouldn't even be comfortable doing the kind of things that he watches. I'm sure he wouldn't want to subjugate you to the type of humiliation common in most porn so I wouldn't feel inadequate.

When watching porn the viewer takes on the role of a voyeur, experiencing the sexual acts vicariously and safely through the video or photos. Even when shot from first person the viewer feels safe knowing it isn't really happening to him/her. It is not an authentic sexual experience nor is it meant to be, so it doesn't replace actual real life sex.

To overcome the problem you have with your fiancés porn watching I suggest you do one of the following:
(i) Confront him and tell him you want him to stop. This may not be the best approach because as I've remarked, your reasons for doing so are jealous and paranoid. However if it's something you can't get over, best to make your problem known and out in the open. Then you can discuss it.
(ii) Get back into porn yourself, perhaps watch porn with him. It could be a kind of nice thing you could do together to get each other in the mood.
(iii) Get over it in general by realising it is not necessarily destructive to your relationship. That said, if it is sadistic/violent/etc. porn he is watching or if he watches very frequently it could be a problem.

In any case discussing it with him is the best course of action. Approach him having thought about it and in a calm state of mind. Do not let things like this get in the way of what I hope is an otherwise happy relationship. Peace

The way to tell him is to say, "I think so little of myself that I compare myself negatively to images of other women on a screen. I am embarrassed about sexuality, and I think sex is dirty and wrong to look at. I tell myself that you looking at porn means you don't like me, despite how obviously irrational that sounds. In other words, honey, you looking at porn hurts me because I am an emotionally stunted, sexually repressed person. So, quit doing something that's perfectly normal and enjoyable for you, because I am so messed up it bothers me."

In other words, tell him the truth.

you probably need to go live in the mountains in some secluded cabin with him because that's the only way you would get ANY man to not look at other woman. The porn part is better than him cheating.

Happy just hit the nail on the head.

Honestly he married you he has sex with you and only you for the rest of his live. If he wants to research better ways to please you how can you be hurt by that.

He is looking for new positions and Role Play scenarios to bring into the bedroom to share with the women he loves.

Remember there is always 2 sides to the story. Instead of trying to convert him to your side, why dont you try to understand his side of it. Then try to meet some where in the middle.

pick up a crack habit..

You're asking for something impossible, to be the only woman he looks at that way.

You can tell him how much it hurts you, and how much you want him to stop looking at it, fine. But even if he relents, he's lied to you - because he's a human being. He's physically attracted to porn, just like the majority of men and women are. It seems easier to just accept that, then to pour out your hurt and browbeat him until he 'gives in'.

When I was younger and less secure it hurt me, too. Now I realize, if you can't beat em', jin em'. And with my boyfriend of three years, it's been a loooot of fun.

I doubt that he is looking at pornstars the way he looks at you. You have to understand that most men don't watch porn because the women are hot, or because they would like to be with that woman. They watch it for visual stimulation.

I've heard that the repercussions of p0rn can kill a kitty or two, but I've never heard of it hurting a fiance.

Well this is tricky because its something you liked before you got together. You have ultimately turned your back on something he shared with you and this coming from a man with a similar need that WAS shared before me and my girl got together. As a gamer then it was loved by her and now it isn't. Be carefull that your dislike doesn't turn him away. Also you need ask him more of what he likes in the bedroom maybe you'll begin to see his needs for what they are. However nasty or nice they may be. We are all only human.

You have unrealistic expectation. Your fiance does not have a problem, you do. Watching porn does not mean in anyway he doesn't love you, is not attracted toward you or you don't satisfy him.

It's humanly impossible for a man to only have sexual thoughts for his mate. Men have sexual thoughts all day long about every female around them. If they act or not on those sexual urges is what makes them men with integrity or not.

I am no longer a person however I believe such a lot men watch porn however I believe there's a time and situation for it and it must no longer be such a lot. Also, I doubt he alternatives any precise frame sort of lady. It particularly might be any of the porn ladies, he simply alternatives one. Most men like any forms of ladies so I could no longer take it individual. It has not anything to do with him no longer liking your or something or your elements. However, in case you have those issues you point out along with your frame and in case you inform him you select he no longer watch it, then he must admire that. And, if disagrees then, you ought to come to a decision in case you wish to stick within the dating.

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I think that your request is a little too controlling. Porn is a part of life for a man. It has nothing to do with you, guys like porn that's a fact. I would be more worried if my guy wasn't looking at porn. I know my boyfriend looks at it and looks at it often, even though it's not something that I do that often it doesn't bother me one little bit that he does, as long as it doesn't get in the way of our sex life i'm fine with it. Why would something so silly ever hurt you, no man should have to stop looking at porn it's human nature!

If you really want to get him out of the porn mode, you can try a few things my wif...er..my sister used on her husband. ( of course this only works with actual porn, and not just pics or movies of women only)
Start watching movies with him ( or let him catch or overhear you alone)-- say things like " Wow--he's huge" or " look at the size of this guy"...or " I wish _______( insert name here ) could do that to me" ..etc..etc..

He will become so self conscious of himself, he'll lose interest in it

I know exactly how you feel it is the same way at my house, unfortunately I am finding that all men are pigs it has nothing to do with you not being enough, guys just like to see naked chicks, its a bummer I mean just sit down with him and really explain how you feel and hopefully he understands and cuts back, or offer to watch it together

Communicate it just like you said above...Sit him down, and make him understand how it makes you feel.

It's that simple...