im so depressed im literally drinking my life away.i want help but have no close friends or anyone to talk to?

First, I am sorry to hear that your mom tried to commit suicide, but I do hope that things have turned around for her, and that she is on a different path now. I think your mom is a huge part of why you are drinking, and feeling unhappy. Right now, you are both in need of help as I'm sure she has issues to resolve and she also just needs to talk to someone. But, you must be there for her, first and foremost. In any way you can.

Next, since you are only 19, and your heart has been broken twice, I can tell you that you are very likely to have many more broken hearts. It is hard to go through that rejection, but sooner or later you realize that the person was not Mr. Right. And then you date someone else and totally forget about the other guy!!

You say you have low self esteem, and yet you have friends....I wonder what it is that your friends like about you? Are you fun to be around with? Do you do things for each other, are you there for them? I would be curious as to why you feel such low self-worth. You say that deep down you hate your life, but I don't think you do. I think, rather, that you are just depressed right now and it goes back to your mom.

And your feeling depressed about your mom, your feeling unhappy, your low self-esteem, is all leading you to that escape: alcohol. You turn to the alcohol to escape whatever it is....thoughts of your mom, feelings that you're not good enough. But the cold hard facts are, that if you continue to use alcohol as an escape, you will be in a much worse situation than you could have ever imagined. You'll continue to wake up feeling lousy and sick, which will ruin your entire day. You won't have the feeling of accomplishing anything because alcohol will take over your life. Aside of feeling sick, it can quickly turn into an addiction, and you will be at higher risk for developing serious health issues, like a damaged liver from all the booze. But the main thing to realize, is that even after you drink to escape things, those same things will be there the very next day. So, all that drinking really doesn't solve anything, does it??

Other than going through your mom's situation, things aren't as bad as you think......your mom is still here, you're in college, and you'll have the chance to do well for yourself. If your relationship with your mom has suffered, now is your chance to take back that relationship and give your mom reasons to feel happy about her life. I do think you should open up to your friends...they care about you more than you think.

What's making you have low self-esteem? What do you think will help you gain confidence? If it's your physical appearance, get a new wardrobe, get a new haircut, get a make over. Whatever. Do whatever it takes to gain the confidence, girl. And another thing. Don't forget that YOU can also take the initiative. Ask someone to hang out. I'm naturally shy and quiet too but if I really wanted to be friends with someone, I'll talk. Think about how much you hate being lonely. Simply talking is the first step out of this. Is there any specific person you feel that you would get along great with? Talk to that person. Friendship takes effort. You gotta give. If you want friends, be a friend. It's okay if you don't find the right people to be your friends at school. You can have a whole other life outside of school. Maybe volunteer someplace. Take extracurricular activities ?

first i want to say,love yourself especially if you feel you are alone'base on my own experience before i commit suicide i drink everyday,one morning i wake up and realize that nobody love and take care myself but me...try to find something new and you realy want to do,grow up girl and tell to yourself i can handle whatever is it...i can be your friend to if u want?have a nice day.

If you want help then you need to talk to one of your friends. If they are the type to who will not judge you and will be there for you no matter what. Then, you need to go to them talk to them. They might not be able to support you with the best type of advice but it’s good to know that someone’s there. It doesn’t look like drinking is solving you problems. It might take your worries away at night but they come right back in the morning.

I know what it’s like for you mom to try to commit suicide and I know what it’s like to feel hurt, and want to die, but scared to. I used to go out with my friends acting like I was happy, but I didn’t know what it was. Until someone, my friend, saw through it. Saw through all of it. She really helped. She had helped a lot actually. If you want to get out of what you’re in try to let your emotions out in healthier way, because pretending makes it worse. If you want change. You have to be that change. Try to open up, as hard as it might be, but it can help you out.



i hope things work out, i am here if you need anything at all (:<3

Aw honey. I've been in this situation. I know people who have gone through this. I know exactly how you feel, especially about just wishing things would end and you hate yourself etc.
Do you have a close sibling? Or any other close family member? I know you aren't comfortable with your friends, but honestly, sometimes all you need is a friend. Going to a therapist isn't going to be any better. Therapists don't care about their patients. You spill your hearts out to them, and when you go to your next appointment, it's as if they don't even remember you. It's the ugly truth.
I know it's hard to stop drinking especially when it's your only escape from reality, but you need to. That's the first thing. Or at least have just one drink a night to start off. Just try your hardest not to buy the alcohol anymore. Do something else with your time. If you like writing, start creative writing. Draw. Join a sport. Go out with the friends you have for a fun night.
Don't think anymore negative thoughts. Sometimes when you have a lot of time on your hands, you tend to think things through deeply, and that isn't good in this case. So, it brings me back to find a new hobby. Think positive thoughts, tell yourself everything will be okay, it's just a phase.
You shouldn't hate yourself. Compare your life to others in say Africa, who are striving to survive. Love yourself. No one should hate themselves. You've done nothing wrong. You were born into this world for a reason, so be glad.
I'm not sure who or how they broke your heart, but if it was a boy, well, you will be over it one day, I promise. As for your mother, I've never been in that situation, but maybe you should talk to her. Ask her what's wrong, or tell her that you're depressed. Talking ususally helps, especially if it's with a family member who can understand you better than anyone else.
I don't know if I helped at all, but I tried. If you ever need anyone, I'm here to talk to. Good luck. <33

First, I need to say, there is help for you...but you have to reach out... If there are issues from past and present that are eating away at you, you need to deal with them, trying to drink them away or getting injured in an accident will not make them go away.. Alcohol will only depress you more, so it is time to wean yourself off the booze first and foremost..., If you want to succeed at school you will need to work on getting yourself together.. It will not happen over night, so don't look for a magical formula.
There are counselors at the college and you will make time for them if you want help.. it is not going to be easy, but how important are you???? Ask yourself that question..very important and don't forget that. You need professional help and no one on this site can help you. ..
Pretending you are okay is not okay. If you want to get to the bottom of this and find out what is wrong, you need to seek out help. You might be suffering from depression and will benefit on meds.. don't throw yourself respect out the window, fight for yourself and dig down deep to get the courage you so deserve... take care and good luck

Darling, i feel so sad and sorry about it.
Well, my best fd tried to kill herself last thursday too
i was broken-hearted but i know i have to move on. And i sorta had a same problem like you, i had low self-esteem when i was younger( and i am only 17 right now!) People used to tease me saying i am the fattest and the ugliest girl in the whole form, and laughed at me because i've got pimples on my face. I had an emotional crackdown that time. No one really wanted to talk to me or something because there were rumours that touching me would let them gain weight..
Well you know i've got no friends then, but i still move on and tried to be myself, i later went swimming everyday and then i lose some weight. I tried to talk to people more and being nice to them, i wasnt hiding anymore. The whole point is to open your mind and do something to make you feel better.

Well, you can talk to me, send me emails and msgs through this account. Hope i help you.

Call kids help phone. I used too, and they are quite helpful. It doesn't matter since you're over the age limit. Ranting to them will help relieve stress and they might have solutions.

As for depression, maybe join a youth group. It was very uplifting for me and you have the support of everyone there.

Also, I took up art as a hobby. I occupied hours creating things and listening to music and I had no time to think so that helped as well. I also made a list of upcoming good days so I knew what i had in the future to cheer me up. Write holidays, nights out with friends, birthdays, any day that is a little bit more special then the rest.

If all else fails maybe try anti depressants.

Aww, I'm really sorry. I'm sort of going through the same as well. :(

Apparently drinking isn't helping your situation whatsoever. The first step to recovering from all of this is to put an end to drinking. Once you end that the rest should follow.

If you need anyone to talk to who won't judge you, please feel free to email me!

You can talk to me if you want, I've been through the whole wanting to die thing, so send me a message if you wanna talk a bit.