一篇我的英文日記,希望大家能指出我的文法錯誤和多餘的詞彙!!

I like to read the diaries she keeps, and one is about living abroad that she missed her family very much. She also said studying abroad cost a lot and she once worried about whether her family could afford so she worked for easing her family’s tuitional burden. Then she said some interesting things about her part-time job, and felt lucky to get this chance that she would value it by studying hard.

Nostalgia’s general for overseas students. Many of them are below eighteen, who still need their families’ care, since the young usually find hard to cope with their living environment. Moreover, they have to take care of themselves when living abroad, if they cannot accept this change, a few of them may give up their study. However, not all families can afford the fee and therefore not all students have a chance to study abroad, if I have a chance to study abroad, I will definitely value it because the cost is vast.


你寫日記都夾敍夾議,文法+文法都好難兼顧,一係你寫長d關於佢份工嘅趣事一段/做嘢辛苦一段/讀書辛苦一段,佢嘅睇法/領悟+你嘅感覺一段好d---好似你話喺外國讀書好易放棄學業,又會講番佢日記內容.

有時簡單有簡單嘅好,夾敍夾議要俾d轉接詞,唔係人地唔明你寫乜.同埋最尾嗰句好奇怪,日記寫俾自己睇,唔會話你應該點做.

She has a habit of writing diaries, and I have a habit of reading hers. When she was living
abroad, I knew she missed her family very much from her diaries. I thought she had
nostalgia which is not surprising for overseas students. It is difficult for the youth to change their living environment. A lot of overseas students are under eighteen years old who still need the care from their families. However, when they live abroad, they have to care about themselves. Some students may give up their studies because they cannot accept this change.

She also mentioned some interesting things about her part-time job. She said studying abroad
is very costly. She once worried if her family can afford her expenses, so she got a job to relieve the financial burden of her family. The tuition is not something that all families can afford, so
not everybody has a chance to study abroad.

She feels lucky for getting this chance and thus study hard for valuing it. So, if you
also have a chance to study abroad, you have to value it because it is very costly.

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