請批改我的英文文章 - Ans.fyi 參考答案

請批改我的英文文章

2009-02-25 7:35 am

可能文法錯好多
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In this year, Hong Kong Government in order to hold the East Asian Games so Hong Kong Government establish sports centre in different regions to encourage the people to do exercise. However, the gym room of Tin Shui sports centre is low utility rate than other facilities. In gym room of Tin Shui sports centre, it has precious materials but low utility rate is problem. Because sports centre operate expenses is to assume sole responsibility for its profits or losses.(自負盈虧). Gym room need much expenses to maintenance(保養) of precious materials. This paper presents the findings of the research and record on the Audit Commission and Leisure and Cultural Services Department. We will base on this paper to make marketing plan to Tin Shui sports centre improve utility rate.

Regarding to Audit Commission report in 2004 to 2008. From 2004, there was an increasing usage rate of stadium facilities, including the fitness room. However, fitness room utilization rates are low compared to other room, and Compared with some room, more away from the double; for example dance room have 63% of usage rates, fitness room only 30%.(Appendix 1: Provision of facilities with low usage.)

Fitness rooms have been provided in two recently built sports centres, i.e. the Tai Kok Tsui Sports Centre and the Tin Shui Sports Centre. However, the usage rates of the fitness rooms were lower than the
territory-wide rate of 30% in 2007-08. Audit examination of the LCSD records did not reveal any justifications for providing fitness rooms in these centres. Audit has
recommended that the Director of Leisure and Cultural Services should critically review, in consultation with the District Councils, the public demand for R&S facilities (particularly those with low usage) when planning for their provision.

回答 (1)

samliu0605

2009-02-25 10:05 am

✔ 最佳答案

香港特區政府 (The Government of the Hong Kong Special Administrative Region)
自負盈虧 (Self-financing)
唔明你這句 and Compared with some room, more away from the double。我估係：同其他室比計，甚至多過雙倍(more than double)
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In order to promote the 2009 East Asian Games, The Government of the Hong Kong Special Administrative Region has opened sports centre in different districts to encourage citizens to do exercise. However, the usage rate of the gym room of Tin Shui Sports Centre is lower than the other facilities. Since the sport centres are self-financing, it a a problem to have sufficient income to maintain the expensive physical equipment. This Paper presents the findings of the research and record on the Audit Commission and Leisure and Cultural Services Department (LCSD). Our marketing plan to improve the usage rate of Tin Shui Sports Centre will be based on this Paper.

Regarding to Audit Commission Reports from 2004 to 2008, there was an increasing usage rate of stadium facilities, including the fitness room. However, the usage rate of the fitness room was still low if compared to other rooms. The usage rate of some rooms was even more than double, e.g. the usage rate of dance room was 63% while the fitness room was 30% only.(Appendix 1: Provision of facilities with low usage.)

Fitness rooms have been provided in two recently-built sports centres, i.e. the Tai Kok Tsui Sports Centre and the Tin Shui Sports Centre. However, the usage rate of the fitness room was lower than the
territory-wide rate of 30% in 2007-08. Audit examination of the LCSD records did not reveal any justifications for providing fitness rooms in these centres. Audit has recommended that the Director of LCSD should critically review, in consultation with the District Councils, the public demand for R&S facilities (particularly those with low usage) when planning for their provision.

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