口試呀><幫我睇下有冇野要改或者係文法錯..thx!!

Good morning everybody. My name is Karlie. I am 17 years old and currently a Form 5 science student. (We normally put the most important information first in a self introduction, therefore I changed to put “17 years old” at the beginning of the sentence.) I am very happy to introduce myself to all of you here.

I like my name very much because it was created by me, and therefore I think it is unique! But, (stop for 2 seconds to attract the audiences’ attention on why you say ‘but”) when I searched this name on the internet such as google and Yahoo, I found many many-------"Karlie"! I was very surprised and now (put the word “now” first to stress the change of your feeling before and after you searched on the internet.) I think my name is not special anymore! I also have a nick name which is (stop for 2 second for the audiences to guess what your nick name is, then when you say “curry”, you should raise up your voice to stress how strange this nick name is) curry. I think it is very strange and I don't know the reason why it became my nick name, although my friends call me in this name for a very long time!

Everyone have strength and weakness, I am no exceptional. I always feel (you need a verb “feel” here, if not this part of your sentence has no verb) extremely nervous in my examination so I make (no “a” unless you make the same mistake every time. We use present tense “make” since this action always happens) careless mistakes every time. As for strength (we cannot change from talking about weakness to strength without letting the audience notice, so I add “as for strength” at the beginning of this sentence), I will do or say many interesting things since I hate making people bored. I think it is the reason that I have many friends! In addition, when I want to do something, I will do my best and never give up, even if it is more difficult.



2009-01-04 02:56:57 補充：
Now I have two goals. First one is that I will try some ways to make me less nervous in my exam. Another goal is that I will put more efforts in my study in order to get better results. I will do my best

2009-01-04 02:57:26 補充：
(many people say “I will try my best”, but “try” is not correct since it has the meaning that you “just try”. Use “do my best” can better express your determination) to learn and improve my knowledge.

Good morning everybody. My name is Karlie who is seventeen years old currently. I am a Form Five (do not use the number abbreviation in English composition) Science (Science should be in Capital letter) student. I am very happy to introduce myself to all of you here.

I like my name very much because it was created by myself, thus I think it is unique. But ever since I searched my name using the search engines such as Google, Yahoo, etc., I found many many "Karlie on the Internet. I was very surprised and I don't think my name is special anymore. I also have a nickname (Nickname is one word) which is called "Curry." I personally think it is a very strange nickname. Ican't figure out the reason for this nickname despite the fact that my friends called me like that for a very long time!

Everyone have their goodness and weakness, and I am of no exception. I am always extremely nervous in my examination, and that cause me to make careless mistakes. I hate boring people, thus I will do or say many interesting things. I think that is the reason why I have so many friends! In addition, when I want to something, I will try my best and never give up.

Now I have two goals - the first one would be I wil use some days to alleviate my nervousness during the examination. The other goal is I will give my best shot in my studies. In that way, I will achieve better results and improvements.

Good morning everybody. My name is Karlie, [I am 17 years old and a Form 5 science student.] I am very happy to introduce myself to all of you here.

[I like my name very much because it is created by me],and therefore I think it is unique! [But when i searched this name on the internet,i can see many many-------"Karlie",such as on the google, yahoo, etc]...I was very surprised and [I don't think that my name is special anymore!] [I also have a nick name,it's called Curry]..[I think it's very strange and i don't know why, even though my friends have been calling me this for a very long time.]

[Everyone has strengths and weaknesses], I am not exceptional. [I am always extremely nervous in my examination so I make careless mistakes everytime.] [I hate making people feel bored so I do or say many things interesting,I think it is the reason why I have many friends!] In addition,when I want to do something,I will do my best and never give up, [even though there are a lot of difficulties.]

Now I have two goals, [one is I will find some ways to be concentrated instead of being nervous in my exam]; [another goal is I will put more effort on my studies in order to get better results and I will try my best to learn and improve.]

結構尚算流暢, 第三段的首句承接上文開啟下文進入描述自己長處與短處, 過度得非常自然. 整體來說內容表達清楚, 屬中上之作.

1. I like my name very much......
2. now i am having two goals.....
3. first is that i will use some ways to be serious to exchang nervous in my exam.......
4. Another goal is that i will put effort in my studies in order to get better results and i will try my best to learn and improve it.