請麻煩你們幫我譯做英文呀

My name is Guan Shumin, this year 12 years old, live in the New Territory Tianshuiwei, from the elementary school is Hong Kong Youth Association Li Zhaoji the Elementary school, in the school, the place which I most like is the library, because inside is very forever tranquil. I most like the color is the powder purple, I most like the fruit is an apple, I most like the drinks are the hot chocolate. I like playing the computer, listens to music, treads the bicycle and plays the badminton.

死關公，上次件事我未同你計，話我整哭人地，你食la，連d男仔同見到你整哭佢呀，話我?!，你邊位呀，溝仔就溝仔，食屎大，你咁樣衰，點會有人溝你呀，係到溝人地先ｌａ，唉，死ｏｎ９，各位如果你地要佢電話，我俾你地！

哈...
關公問英文w0r
笑死我na

My name is Kwan Shuk Man. I am twelve years old, living in Tin Shui Wai, N.T.
I study at xx Primary School. The place I like most at school is the school library because it is very quiet.
I colour I like most is pastel purple. I like apple, chocolate and for drink hot chocolate.
I like playing game in computer, listening to the music, riding bicycle and playing badminton.

You are welcome:-
My name is Kwan Shu Min, I am twelve years old and I live in Tin Shui Wai of New territories, I am studying in Hong Kong Youth association Lee Siu Kee Primary school. The library is the place that I always go there in the school as it is always the silent place for me to go.
My favorite colour is Pale Purple and i like eating apple a lot, I like drinking hot chocolate as well.
In my leisure time, I like to work with the computer, listening to music, riding bicycles and playing badminton.

My name is to close Shu quick, this year is twelve years old, live in water in New Territory sky to round, the primary school coming from is Hong Kong youth association Li Zhao Ji's primary school, at the school, I the most favorite place is a library, because of in forever all very rather.I the most favorite color is that the powder is purple, I the most favorite fruit is an apple, I the most favorite beverage is a hot chocolate.I like to play a computer and listen to music and step bicycle and play badminton.

My name is Guan Shumin, this year 12 years old, live in the New Territory Tianshuiwei, from the elementary school is Hong Kong Youth Association Li Zhaoji the Elementary school, in the school, the place which I most like is the library, because inside is very forever tranquil. I most like the color is the powder purple, I most like the fruit is an apple, I most like the drinks are the hot chocolate. I like playing the computer, listens to music, treads the bicycle and plays the badminton.