改善英文行動 32. 希望大家盡力幫忙

What are some of possible dangers when going on a school trip?


Firstly, many students like playing near rivers so they may possibly fall into the river and get (no were – because we are talking about a possibility, not something that actually happened) drown. Thus, students should stay (no need for far – because stay away already has the meaning of not getting near) away from rivers.

Secondly, students may be attacked by animals such as snakes, bees and spiders and therefore they should walk carefully as well as don't touch any thing(no s) that looks strange (at random means doing something without a purpose, but this normally refer to an action that you want or need to do, but you do not know how to do or do not want to make a decision, then you do something at random. For example : I do not know which movie to watch so I just choose movie A at random).

Also, students may get loss in a school trip because they just go (arrive does not equal to your first time being there, while “go there the first time means you have never been in that place before.) there the first time. So students should follow their teachers or go with their classmates together when you go to a strange place. (If we do not divide the above into 2 sentences, then we have a problem of reasoning – the “so students should follow…. Becomes part of the reason that students may get loss).

Apart from above, it is easy to catch fire during barbecues. So students should prepare enough water before you begin barbecues. That can ensure safety of yours. (If we do not break the sentence after barbecues, the “that” will then refer to the barbecue, not the preparation of enough water.)

In short, if students follow the direction of teachers during the school trip, they will not get hurt easily.

Content : 9/10
Grammar : 9/10
Logic : 7/10
Vocabulary : 9.5/10

the first answer has a mistake "get loss" which should be "get lost"