(VERY URGENT!!!!)有沒有好心人替我proofread 一段約五百字的英文??

As all of you know 刪去會比較好
nowadays, internet develops very rapidly and it provides us with convenience.
however, at the same time, it also creates a lot of problems, such as the recent scandal about the sexual photos of celebrities. It showed that the personal privacy can be leaked out easily on the net.

2008-04-16 02:38:32 補充：
你要注意一下grammar
1. also唔會影響 後面個verb 使唔使加s
2. But it also create a lot of problem , 你前面只係話佢發展好快,冇話佢有好處, 唔可以用but
3. problem係要加s的

2008-04-16 02:38:36 補充：
4. recently(adv.) the celebrity(n.) sex(n.) photo(n.) scandal(n.)
小錯誤: 名人同相片都係要加s
大錯誤: 將d詞語連埋一齊,唔係就咁寫埋一埋就得
photos(n.)要用adj.黎形容 ( sexual)
scandal(n.)要用adj.黎形容(recent)
5.
the personal privacy problem leaking out is very easy
同(4)一樣

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