幫我see下我ｏ的文，有咩錯　比個分我（１篇）

ACCORDING TO YOUR IDEAS, I WOULD WRITE AS FOLLOWS:


Now, it is November. I am planning for a trip with my family during Chinese
New Year. "Where shall we go during Chinese New Year?" I asked my parents.
"We have been to Japan for two times, Thailand for three times....... I think we
should not go anywhere this year." said my mother. "Why?" I asked. "Why?
It is because we have already been to some foreign places several times. We should
go to China this year, o.k? said my mother. "O.K." I said.


YOUR MISTAKES ARE RELATED TO GRAMMAR, TENSES AND IT LOOKS LIKE
CHINESE ENGLISH.

2007-12-01 00:49:17 補充：
Or you can say : WE HAD BEEN TO JAPAN FOR TWO TIMES,........... andWE HAD ALREADY BEEN TO SOME FOREIGN/OVERSEAS PLACES SEVERAL TIMES.............

It is November, I will go a trip with my family in Chinese New Years. “Where will us going on at the Chinese New Years?’ I ask to my father and mother. “Am…the Japan we went to it for two times; the Thailand we went to it for three times……I think we don’t go to anywhere this year.’ Say my mother. “Why?’ I ask. “Why? It is because we go to other place of the world many times already, therefore this year we play in China, ok?’ say my mother. “Ok,’ I say.

改為

In November, I will take a trip to once with my family on the Spring Festival together. Complain about here will we of the Spring Festival? I ask my parents. Japan we go it twice; I Go to its Thailand and think our counselor goes to any place this year. Talk about my mother. Why? I ask. OK? This, because we have already gone to a lot of times other places of the world, we in China this year, ok? Talk about my mother. All right, I say.

分數６５

It is November now and my family is planning a trip for the Chinese New Year holiday.'Where are we going to during the Chinese New Year?’ I asked my father and mother. 'Hmm…We have been to Japan twice and Thailand for 3 times, I don't want to go to the same place this year.' my mum said. 'Why?’ I asked. 'Why? Since we have been to the same overseas countries many times, how about going to China this year?' my mum suggested. 'OK.' I replied.

我會用黃底紅字, 代表改正後的字
It is November, I shall go to a trip with my family in the Chinese New Year. I asked to my father and mother. "Where will we go in the Chinese New Year? My mother said "Am... We have gone to Japan twice before; and have gone to Thailand for three times before... I think we don't go to anywhere this year." Then, I asked "Why?"; she replied, "Why? It is because we have already gone to other places in the world for many times. Therefore, we will go to China this year, is it ok?" I said, "ok"
我將xxx說......, 寫成xxx said....., 是因為甘樣清楚d, 無甘亂
另外, 將時式寫成過去式, 因為依d應該已過去啦...
希望幫到你
圖片參考：http://hk.yimg.com/i/icon/16/3.gif


2007-12-01 13:21:37 補充：
比分你呀, 比較難, 因我唔係你阿sir / miss真的要分, 我會比 B- (C-以下唔合格)

It is November, I will go a trip with my family in Chinese New Years. “Where will us going on at the Chinese New Years?’ I ask . “Am…the Japan we went to it for two times; the Thailand we went to it for three times……I think we don’t go to anywhere this year.’ said/ask mother. “Why?’ I ask. “Why? It is because we go to other place of the world many times already, therefore this year we play in China, ok?'ask mother. “Ok,’ I say.