請高手幫忙改文法～

From the usage rate, segment the market based on quantity consumed or store visits frequency.
> Usage rate means the volume consumed over a period of time, such as 15L/min. Since you are talking about beverage, it is more common to use the term "consumption."
> I don't know why rate (=the speed) has any correlation with segmentation. I also don't see why "store visits frequency" has any relevance.

Carlsberg beers have a different pack size such as can 330ml, pint bottle 330ml, quart bottle 635ml, draught 15L, draught 30L.
> You cannot pluralize "beer" here because you are referring to one kind of beer - that of Carlsberg.
> I believe that the volume for pint and quart is wrong; 1 US pint = 473 ml, and 1 UK pint = 568 ml; one quart = two pints.

That can satisfy the different customers need and want.
> "Need and want" - I can buy the idea of want, but why would someone "need" beer in a particular size?
> You forgot the apostrophe in the case of possessive: Customers' need

Here is my recommendation:
Based on consumption patterns, the market is segmented by quantity and frequency. Carlsberg Beer offers its beer in 330ml cans, and 330ml and 635ml bottles, and its draught beer in 15L and 30L kegs. This positions Carlsbeg very well in various segments.

From the perspective of usage rate, the market is segmented based on quantity consumed or the frequency of the visits to the stores. Carlsberg beers have different packing sizes, such as 330ml can, 330ml pint bottle, 635 ml quart bottle, 15L draught and 30L draught, which can satisfy the needs and wants of different customers.