Do I have no morales if I live with a guy after only 6months of dating?

2007-08-27 6:45 pm
My mom says I have no morales, and she no longer wants me to be arround my little brother because of my "lifestyle". I am recently divorced, out of a ten year relationship, and my mother lost her husband (my little brothers dad) about four years ago to a heart attack. So, I play a big part in my little brothers life.

She says if I make the decision to live with my current boyfriend that she will not let me see my little brother as much...

Plus she thinks I am jumping from one relationship to another...I am, but I am happy... she says I have'nt given myself time to heel, but I think I have... What do I do??? My mom is disappointed in me, and that is way worse than her being mad at me :) Help...
更新1:

My mom says I have no morales, and she no longer wants me to be arround my little brother because of my "lifestyle". I am recently divorced, out of a ten year relationship, and my mother lost her husband (my little brothers dad) about four years ago to a heart attack. So, I play a big part in my little brothers life. Plus, I need a roommate and I can't afford to live by myself right now (divorce is expensive) but I am going mad living with her. I already practically live with my boyfriend now, as it is for the last two months... She says if I make the decision to live with my current boyfriend that she will not let me see my little brother as much... Plus she thinks I am jumping from one relationship to another...I am, but I am happy... she says I have'nt given myself time to heel, but I think I have... She thinks I should date, I HATE dating, I like this better...What do I do??? My mom is disappointed in me, and that is way worse than her being mad at me :) Help...

回答 (13)

2007-08-27 6:49 pm
✔ 最佳答案
You already said it. Your happy. I really wouldnt even let it bother u as much because your happy and right now thats all that matters.
2007-08-28 1:50 am
Your mother is correct, and she's trying to teach your younger brother some morals. You can date the guy, just don't shack up with him. If you think that you play a big role in your brother's life, then show him how to make good decisions by making some yourself. Doing the right thing is usually harder to do, but in the long run you will respect yourself more and so will your brother and mother.
2007-08-28 2:04 am
no, you haven't given yourself time to heal, and you probably don't have a lot to give emotionally... time will tell what happens and whether this is an "i am still loveable" rebound or something more.

meanwhile, it's not your mother's place to tell you how to live or where to live, or to judge you at all.

she has issues, so i guess you'll just have to live with her decisions. can't fight city hall.
2007-08-28 2:03 am
Personally I think your mother is right--not that you have no morals, but that you're rushing things. You go from ending a 10-year relationship to living with another guy in 6 months. That's waaaay fast. I really think you need to slow down. You can certainly still be happy in the relationship without living together. That’s all just my opinion though.

Regarding your brother, if your mother thinks you’re setting a bad example for your brother because you live someone that you’re not married to, then she has every right to restrict you from seeing your brother. I'm not saying I agree with her, but that is one of her parental rights. You may be able to change her mind about it someday, or you may not. It depends on how adamant she is about the subject.
2007-08-28 1:59 am
well sarah sometimes our moms think they know what is best for us even tho they are a little old fashioned....but living with some one a while before marriage is better than marriage then finding out its not the right one for you....sounds like your old enough to make your own choices so you should do as you see fit...just don't fight with your mom about it just let her speak her mind and she will soften up just give it time...she will get use to it it will just talk some time..just be patient with her just don't argue with her about it...and then maybe things will get better for you and her...just go slow with her and give her time to get use to how things are don't try and force it on her..and everyones idea of morels is different....morels can be keeping your word or living with another girl or living with 2 guys not 1 so don't worry she will get over it. good luck
2007-08-28 1:58 am
don't give in to momma. you are the only person that can decide what makes you happy. You are not morally wrong because you chose to be with this guy after only 6 months. My husband and i met in Dec. and married in May. we've been together going on 21 years. Its all about what kind of relationship the two of you have.
2007-08-28 1:57 am
I moved in with my fiance (boyfriend at the time) after only 2 months of dating. I don't think it's wrong, but maybe you are moving too fast because you just got out of a 10 year relationship/marriage. Your mom is just worried about you. Talk to her about it nicely and tell her you think it is unfair that you can no longer see your brother.
2007-08-28 1:56 am
If you and your boyfriend are happy that is all that counts. but at the same time if you both love each other and want to live together nothing will change if you wait a little longer to give your mother time to get used to the idea. I would give me mother opportunities to spend more time with the two of you to see how great you two are together. Let her see how much you two belong together and she will come around.
2007-08-28 1:54 am
Your mom is really conservative. But talk to her heart to heart and openly, as long as you're not have 2 relationship at the same time, i think it's absolutely fine. It'll takes a little while for her to accept, but prove to her that you still love and care about her and your little borther. The relationship of you and the other shouldn't affect the relationship of you and her and your brother. I believe she'll comes around and understand you more.
2007-08-28 1:53 am
It's too bad when people get into your business so much. You're a grown woman and your mom shouldn't be mad at you or disappointed in you for the making such a decision. She's probably mostly just worried about you and wants you to be happy, but if you are happy with this person, do what you feel is right for you, and hopefully, she will come around. She's having her own issues after having lost her husband. But your little brother needs you, and she should realize that depriving him of you is going to hurt him more--kind of desinged to punish you, I think.

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