How can I get my daughter to stop stealing, lying, and lashing out at my wife?

1. If this is her first incident of lying, stealing and verbal abuse I would come down on her as hard as anything. She has to understand that it will NOT be tolerated.
2. Following her spanking she is to repay the money (even if it has been recovered)
3. Demonstrate that she is NOT going to come between you and your wife
4. Communicate with her and don't forget to tell her you love her but her behaviour will not be tolerated.
5. Have fun as a family-'a family that plays together, stays together.'

She needs a good ol' spanking. And I am not talking about the kind with a switch or leaving marks on her. I am talking about 3 or 4 good smacks on her butt and let her know saying she hates you is not acceptable and you do not want to hear it again.
Now, I am no psychologist, but you really have to review how is the raising of your kid going. She is lacking something. Attention? Rewards when she is good? Or find out why did she take that money? Bad influences? or was it to give to a friend in need? Not everything is black and white with children. Set your rules. Be strong about it. Write them down and pin them in her room, sign a contract with her. Do things together, get to know her real her, her soul.
We all have our good days and bad days. That doesn't make her a demon. But when you set rules, do not let her get away with anything one day and a week later not be ok to do it, that confuses the kids.
Again I do not know your family, so i am just speculating on reasons. You evaluate. Girls need DADDY a lot more than mommy. Be there. Have daddy and daughter days. Take her for ice cream.
Give her your unconditional love...but...NEVER ACCEPT DISRESPECT AND STEALING. Tell her stories about it. Fabs, with morals. Watch what kind of show she watches, what her friends are like. Again SET the rules, make them clear and love her at all times.

I seriously would consider spanking her. Not some weak, doesn't hurt spanking,but a real one. I would suggest a hairbrush, and for a serious offence like that, spanking about 3 times the childs age. This behavior needs to stop and that is a very serious thing for an 8 year old to be doing.

Spend more time with her. Be very firmed let her know stealing is not a right behavior. Honestly I used to steal money from my parent too. My dad gave me a really good spank for that. At the same time he start giving me allowance and teach me how to manage my own finance. Ask her what she'll plan to do with the money, it may be a very good start for her to learn and help her through out her lifetime. Also ask her to donate a certain percentage for charity (teach her about social responsibility) and invest a certain percentage for saving. I asked my kid to start recycling when she was 5, (though I did most of the job, but I made her to go to the recycling center with me everytime) and I let her keep all the recycling money as her pocket money. She learns the value of money and spent every dime with care. I hope this help.

You need to tighten up your parenting skills. At 8 years old a child should not even know about stealing. Are you sure that she the one that took the money? Did you see it happen? Most kids hate their parents especially teenage girls, that is not unusual. But at eight she needs more assistance from you guys as parents. Eight is old enough to know that stealing is wrong. If you find out that she has stolen and you have proof you can punish her by taking away something that she enjoys. But dont punish her unless you have actual proof to show her how you know that she did this. Tell her that stealing from anyone is wrong. Sit down with her look face to face and tell her that stealing is wrong. If you have no proof this time let this be her warning. If you see it happen again tell her their will be consequences. Also let her know that there are ways of earning money even at her age. If she needs money from you, let her know of a way to earn it.

Your wife seems to be suffering from a multitude of mental problems. Megalomania for one. A compulsion to steal. Superiority complex. Believes everyone is below her so manipulates and bosses around. She desperately needs to see a shrink. She's gonna drive everyone away, including you and your family. She's a very clever woman, and her drive and ambition has driven her always. But it's gone to her head, and she needs to come down off that pedestal before she falls down. What does she do with the stuff she steals? Hide it or use it? I think you should go to a shrink yourself first, to explain to him what's happening. Then find a way of getting your wife to go. This won't be easy, because she doesn't believe she's doing anything wrong. Best of luck.

I definitely agree with giving her a few good swats with a paddle, in the proper way, explaining exactly what behaviors she is getting the swats for. I also think you should absolutely find out what she wanted the money for and why she didn't feel like she could ask you for whatever it was she needed. It sounds to me like she's screaming for some attention and is willing to get it in whatever way she can, even if it's flashing around some cash at school or to her friends for whatever it is they think is "cool", hopefully it's not drugs or any other harmful substance!

A spanking is order in my opinion, She is only 8 years old and starting this?? However, do you already spank and perhaps spank ALOT??? maybe its a little rebellion against that and being mad. IF thats the case look at your parenting stratagy and perhaps sit down with her and talk things down and get down to the bottom of her problem. Try something else like making her pay it off with extra chores and were talking hard labor chores not just dusting and vaccuuming. Ground her booty as well. In my opinion a spanking would be the way i would handle it but at the same time you got to figure out why she is doing this and NOT put fuel on the fire.

Spend time with her. Read with her, play with her, take her out to the park. Let her know you are there for her and that you love her immensely. If that doesn't work then smack the sh*t out of here. No seriously, you need to try a lot of different techniques and also the advice of a doctor. But do not give her any medicine until it is your last recourse.

Remember she is only eight and says things like I Hate You to try and hurt your feelings, she really does not mean that and probably is trying to make you feel as bad as she does for stealing,lying and then of course getting caught! I would talk to her about whats right and wrong explain to her that if something does not feel right then its probably not, let her learn from her mistake and all of you drop it, dragging it out will not help her or you.Oh and she is not a demon she is YOUR daughter!And Kids learn what they live.