✔ 最佳答案
你封信學名叫 covering letter 唔係 resume. Resume 係將你嘅 objective, education, experience, skills, reference 之類詳細列明, 等收信人容易了解你嘅背景, 你呢封 covering letter 係應該同 resume 一齊寄出.
我有小小意見關於你封信:
1. 應該有你嘅地址
2. 應該有收信人地址
3. 你點知收信人係 Sir 唔係 Madame, 如果收信人係女仕; 佢多數掉你封信落垃圾桶, 應該寫 Dear Sir/Madame
4. 你打字方法唔正統, full stop 之後應該係 double space, 、唔係 single space. 好似 "....in Business Management."bb"At present, ....." 唔係 "...in Business Management."b"At present, ....."
5 你寫咗五段嘢, 有四段都用 "I" 做開頭, 比啲心機再唸過, 你假假地都係大學畢業;唔好寫啲嘢好似小學生咁.
6 最好你啲電話號碼, 依貓之類放响 resume 度, 唔好放响 covering letter
Sorry, 我對你有多少苛刻, 但都係想你好