這篇英文文章好不好?10分滿分,你給我多少分?(可不可以給我一些意見?)

I have changed some words:

This is my magic pencil.It is colorful.It can fly.It can produce light and talk to people.I use it when I want to draw. When I use it to draw things,the things will come true.I also use it to do my homework.


I think you should be remember the spelling of the words(eg: colorful) and the tense (no tense after "can, may" ). I give 7 marks. Please add oil, you can do better !! =]

對我來說,巳經很好了,可是有一點錯誤,我給7分.

coloaeful--colorful
can gives--can give(can 之後的verb不用轉tense)
the things(可用they 代表)
will come true--will become true


你這篇文章有些創意,但文法有些錯,我認為你得到55分,但不要氣餒,只要寫多些,查多些字典,你自會進步的。

8分 ok!!