Can you find my mistake?

i found u have some mistakes...let me try to correct it for u

Dancing is my hobby.I like dacing because this can train up my body to become more rhythmical and lithe.Science is the subject which I can do very well. While, my favourite subject is English and Mandarin. As English is an international language. If I learn this language well, I may be able to communicate with the foreigners.Mandarin is an universal language in my country. I can learn Mandarin's written language too. In my leisure time, I either play badminton or surf the net. I will be watching television when I am free too.


hope this can help you!!

THIS ACTICLE IS MORE BETTER~

While my best subject is science, my favourite subjects are English and Mandarin. I like English because it is an international language and if I become good at it, I can communicate with people from around the world. Mandarin is the most common language of my country. I learn Mandarin in its spoken form as well as its written form.

Dancing is my favourite hobby. I like dancing because it makes me more rhythmical and flexible. In my spare time, I also like playing badminton or surf the Net. Sometimes, I watch a bit of TV, too.

Notes:

1. Don't use lithe, consider flexible.
2. The bit about dancing should be after your favourite subjects. It seems very out-of-place at the beginning of the essay.
3. Consider _spare time_ instead of _leisure time_.